Lazing around on cushy patio furniture with an ocean view, choosing between attending an onsite yoga class or cooling off on a unicorn floatie in the pool—this probably wasn’t the way that most of us spent our addicted years. But Izzy van Zuilen, founder of Sobertopia, offers this luxe experience in her alcohol-free retreats for women.
In June, I joined a three-night Sobertopia retreat at a swanky villa near Malaga, Spain. Here’s what it was like.
The Digs
Izzy, who lived near Malaga for many years before moving to California in 2024, got into the retreat biz because she wanted to meet more nondrinking women. COVID cancelled her first retreat, but she’s been running twice yearly in Spain since 2022. Part of the fun is looking for the perfect retreat house.
“I do different houses every year because I like to look around new places,” she told me as we sat on a twin bed in my ocean-facing room. “Especially if the same people come, it’s nice to have a new environment. But last year I booked this house, and I loved it so much and everybody loved it, so I just decided to stay with the same one this year.”
We listen to the waves. “I can see why you came back here,” I say.
“It’s cool, isn’t it?” she agrees. “Right on the beach.”
Our house, Villa Ada, has eight bedrooms. I’m sharing a room with Lori Sjollema, our delightful yoga teacher/massage therapist. Bethany Ghersie, our private chef, has a small room behind the kitchen. All the other retreat participants have their own bedrooms. Ideally, Izzy looks for a ten-bedroom house with a pool within an hour or so of an airport in a location with stuff to do.
My favorite things about Villa Ada are the dark wood and exquisite tile work on the stair risers, on the trim, everywhere. And all the outdoor patio areas have padded furniture. And, of course, the miles-long stretch of beach right out front.
The Ladies
Sobertopia emphasizes discretion. We all signed a confidentiality form before the retreat. As a travel writer, I made a couple of short speeches to the group about respecting their privacy. So, no juicy details here. Just some general stats to give you an idea of who goes, and whether a Sobertopia retreat might be for you.
First, it’s all ladies. We ranged from early thirties to early sixties. Since the retreats are in Spain, Izzy draws mainly from the UK and some of Europe. Americans who make the long journey generally combine the retreat with other stops in Europe. Our group included three Americans, one Irish gal, one German living in Spain, and three British women. Most were in recovery or at least quit because they felt they had a problem with alcohol. A couple still drinks a little bit, but question whether they should. Our retreat included four Sobertopia repeat customers.
“There’s quite a few ladies that travel for the first time by themselves,” Izzy told me. “They love the connection and how easy it is to connect during such a short time.”
The Activities
Izzy nicely balanced introspective activities like yoga, sound healing (with the excellent Leonie Schuurman), and a journaling workshop, with fun. One morning, we went to a nearby padel tennis court for a lesson. This sport, which lies between tennis, squash, and pickleball on the racket sport spectrum, was new to me. Padel pro Nacho, a charming host and elegant player, gave us a helpful lesson. The next day, we Ubered into the Malaga city center for tapas and shopping. The ocean was about 70 degrees, so people got in for dips and swims. We had a couple of stand-up paddle boards available for use.
All the activities were optional. Most people participated in most things, but there were always a few who chose sunning by the pool or strolling the beach instead.
Izzy is well-schooled on the latest nonalcoholic beverages. I must have sampled more NA drinks in four days than I had in my lifetime up till then. It was like a nonstop NA open bar, and we ladies knocked back a lot of drinks. There always seemed to be a cooler of canned mocktails and/or an open bottle of NA champagne in the ice bucket. One night, we tried Seagram’s alcohol-free gin with different flavors of tonic.
Besides drinking NA champagne, massage was perhaps the most popular activity. Every one of us signed up for an onsite massage. Lori valiantly worked the giant knot around my right shoulder, and everybody else’s problem areas, too.
Izzy said her retreat activities vary depending on the site. There could be a hike or a Wim Hof cold water immersion workshop. But she always offers yoga and massage.
Food and Drink
Bethany has been Izzy’s personal chef for all her Spain retreats. She makes gorgeous, nutritious food and cheerfully caters to vegans (me!), gluten-free, and other challenging eaters. Breakfast favorites include chia pudding and avocado toast. For dinner, we might find a giant paella. We had a berry birthday cake the first night to celebrate two guests’ birthdays.
Future Sobertopia events
Last year, Izzy moved from Spain to San Francisco. She plans to hold future retreats in California. Check her website for updates. In the meantime, if you’re in San Francisco, you can join her for a monthly walk for sober ladies. Past walks followed the Marina waterfront to the Golden Gate, sometimes ending with a cold plunge. She’s planning walks in the Twin Peaks area, too.
I love Izzy’s dedication to building a community of alcohol-free women. She’s a wonderful hostess who gives women confidence and connection. “I love the organization of it,” she said. “I love the people. I love it when everybody’s so appreciative in the end. Like, ‘Oh my god, this is life-changing.’ And that always makes me cry and gives me shivers. And that’s what I do it for, like at the end, how they react and what it gives people. I love that. It’s so cool.”
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