Online besties, Tamar Medford and Lane Kennedy share their life experiences and hilarious adventures as two women living in long-term recovery. (Which is often messy!) With over 35 years of continuous sobriety, Tamar & Lane support women over 40 who have hit the f*ck it button and find themselves asking WTF! Now What?

Learn how to pause.
Reframe your toxic thinking.
Develop more meaningful connections.
Gain clarity on who you are so you can bust out and live the life of your dreams.

Nothing is off-limits so get ready to experience a lot of laughs and fun along the way.

INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPT (TRANSCRIPTION IS NOT PERFECT)

Lane: Got it. I’m ready.

Tamar: Ready?

Lane: Yeah.

Tamar: Are you sure?

Lane: Not really. I suddenly wanted to look something up. I have no idea why!

Tamar: Focus, focus. Should we change it to being present?

Lane: Let’s be present. I’ll just take a breath. Okay. Okay. I’m ready yesterday. Easy-peasy yeah.

Tamar: Okay. Let’s talk about, let’s talk about, we’ve just been looking through sound effects because. Wow. They’re fun. That is fun.

Land sound effects of wrapping bows on one of the last shows. Although it was pretty good, it didn’t make the cut. So let’s talk about relapse.

Lane: What do you want to talk about? It’s a serious problem

Tamar: and I want a case, so. It drives me crazy when people make the statement that relapse is a part of recovery.

Lane: you want me to talk about other people

Tamar: not to get judgy. Um, and I guess why it drives me crazy is because, you know, we’re into this science and thoughts. And for me, if I had been told that in my first few months, Sobriety. I would have looked at that as a free pass. And I’m not trying to say that relapse is not a part of someone’s recovery and nor should someone feel ashamed if it happens, like maybe there’s, there could be multiple different reasons.

But I think that being told that right off the bat gives, gives us kind of an out that some of us look for in the beginning, because we’re [00:02:00] like, Hm, I dunno if I want to be here. So what if we started stating relapsed does not have to be part of recovery. It is sometimes D does that make sense? It

Lane: makes sense.

When you first found recovery were other people around you relapsing.

Tamar: Yes.

Lane: So what was the difference between you and them?

Tamar: I did the work. I,

Lane: the work being this kind of internal. Self-evaluation spiritual

Tamar: Yeah. I had to change everything. Like I had to step away from a lot of, well, I thought they were friendships.

I just step away from a lot of people. I just change a lot of things, but I mean, when I quit, I wanted to end my life. Like I had the bottle of pills in my hand and I was desperate to get [00:03:00] away from that lifestyle. And I just found myself and I did it too. Right. I was on the pink cloud. And, I found myself doing a lot of similar things that I did when I was drinking, but sober and that didn’t always make me feel good.

Like I had an emotional hangover. And I think because I had good guidance that people that told me, like, be mindful of who you spend your time with, be mindful of what you do. I feel very fortunate that I had that and people really called me.

Lane: Not everyone has that.

Tamar: No, not everyone has that no

Lane: which is really sad.

And that law, I think a lot of times, you know, people don’t even realize, like I didn’t realize it was an option to take a drink again. That wasn’t my experience. Uh, I remember the first time I had gotten sober and I was hanging out with, with some people and then they drank again and I thought, oh [00:04:00] my God, What, what does that mean?

It was like a big deal and I didn’t understand it. I didn’t understand what relapse was. Uh, so for me, this idea of relapse is like, what, what do you mean? Why would you do that? Um, and I still kind of think about that now in our, in, in how I look at recovery. It’s like, why are you falling back in. Behavior.

And that’s been really tough. I mean, because, especially with some of the clients that I work with because I work with relapsed. And so a lot of times it’s this chronic condition that they get to a point where they want to make a change and then they, something sets them off and then they end up using again.

And then there’s the guilt and the shame spirals. Right. And the emotional upheaval. [00:05:00] So it’s really, I mean, it’s super challenging when they’re in that chronic condition. And when I’m doing a deep dive with somebody, it is, we’re no longer talking about self-investigating. Like that’s not, I’m looking at how can we, or how can I help them connect to this inner resource that’s going to shift their lives.

So relapses again, that chronic condition is it’s deadly. I mean, I’ve had people die on me, like, and it doesn’t have to be, it doesn’t have to be, um, a part of someone’s story. Like it wasn’t, I mean, it’s not a part of my story. And I think my, you know, this universe that keeps me sober every day for that.

But then there’s [00:06:00] also, I have known people that have lived in long-term recovery and then taking a drink and relapses now part of their story and they’re sober again. Thank God for that.

Am I going in the right direction?

Tamar: you are. And I, I think, I guess the reason it bothers me now more than ever is that most of the people that I got sober with are no longer alive. Right. And it’s just the reality of living in this world. I mean, you have friends in your recovery that you hope. That they never have to experience that and you never have to lose them.

Right. Because we get close to people in recovery. So that’s one of them. Maybe that’s a selfish side of me. That’s like stop telling people that it’s part of recovery. I don’t know, cause relapse is not a part of my story either. And I’ve had to do a lot of work on that. I mean, it could have easily been, especially in those times of complacency, but now knowing what I know about the [00:07:00] way we think and what we tell ourselves, I know that if I get that one little idea that this time it might be different or maybe relapse needs to be a part of my story, then that, that kind of thinking will take me back.

And that’s when I could slip up. So I guess. Knowing that we get more and more of what we think about it’s like, why, why are we telling people relapse is part of recovery because it doesn’t ha it doesn’t have to be

Lane: Right. It doesn’t have to be. I see. So it’s really the language, the presentation that it’s an option.

Yeah. Yeah. Where you’d like to change that as you don’t have to rely on. No, it doesn’t have to be an option. There are other ways to move through your life. Yeah. I don’t know. It’s tough. That’s tough, it’s an interesting place to be because, of the years that I have, right. And being around a lot of people who have relapsed and working with that clientele, it’s.

Like I have no control over. You have no control over it. Yeah. I don’t want the language to be the barrier, you know? Like what else can we call it? Um, ’cause it’s not a slip, right? Like I can not stand it when they say I slipped. I’m like, what did you slip on a banana? Like, come on, don’t use that language.

I took a drink and it was intense. Yeah, I knew I was going to do it because the, and I go, I just go back to my experience with working with people is that there is that strong. They know that they’re going in for it, you know? It’s yeah. They know

Tamar: I’ve heard that we relapsed before we relapse. Yeah.

Lane: Yeah. The drink is the last, the very last thing. Very last action that’s taken. Right? So it’s this. That gets delusional or distorted because of something minor or major. And then they’re down that rabbit hole. Yeah. I had a client, uh, recently who, uh, the alarm from the fire truck, it broke her. Wow. And she was suddenly sitting with the bottle.

But that was the last action. Right? So it was before that we get back.

Tamar: Yeah. And I know lots of people who have relapsed and that have been very fortunate to make it back. And I would never shame them. I never think badly of people, like that’s just part of their own stories, but the reality is. You know, a relapse could mean not coming back.

A lot of people don’t have that opportunity. No. So has there ever been a time in your recovery that you even thought about it drinking

Lane: again? Yeah. You know? Yeah. Um, there was a time, I think it was maybe four or five and I was with my brother and. Something happened where all of a sudden I had a beer in my hand, I was like, what is happening here?

But it wasn’t, it wasn’t a conscious decision to be like, oh, I am going to intentionally go to the bar and buy vodka and pick up a drink that has never been apart. And I pray that it will never be in my brain that way because it’s deadly. Um, I’m the type of alcoholic that I don’t know what’s going to happen to me once.

Substance into my body. I mean, I get in the car and I drive right now with my car. I would be driving super fast. I just don’t like, yeah, I don’t want my way upmarket street. I mean, literally, I’d be fine. I don’t even know.

Tamar: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that’s, I think what scares me the most is because I didn’t just stop at alcohol because I’m.

I like to go higher and then all of a sudden I need to go lower. So I there’s, I finally, I think hit a state in my recovery where I’m actually in this like, pretty, like it’s not as wavy anymore, which is really nice, but like, Especially, because with all the stuff out there right now, but I ma I feel like my ego would be like, well, you already messed up your sobriety.

You might as well go hard. Right. Because I’d want to try all the things again, all of them

Lane: got it all in there. Right. Let’s get the psychedelics in there. Let’s get the legal drugs now, you know, like when I, that’s one [00:12:00] thing where I’m like, oh, you know that legal MTMA, I’m that always. You know, I could I do that and get away with it, but that would be a relapse.

Tamar: Yeah. And that’s how I feel too, because I know there’s a lot of talk about it. Right. There’s a lot of talk on different methods that help people get sober. But again, my fear is what I mean, I drank that, you know, non-alcoholic wine and I felt like I was relapsing. Right. Right. And I had the emotional effects of that.

Like I had consequences to that action. Yeah. That makes it so hard. That scared

Lane: me. And how long were you in the kind of the black hole in the black hole that kind of dim emotional?

Tamar: Uh, the hangover? About a day. Yeah, maybe to like the second day I started to come out at the first day, I was just. Oh my God.

What the hell did I do? And after I had talked about it a little bit, because that’s in the past, I would have done it and just not talked about it. I would’ve been like, okay, well, I didn’t drink. That’s the most important part let’s go on with my day. And this time I actually reached out and I was like, this is what I did not feel so good. And I think that takes the power out of it,

Lane: uh, that emotional dark hole, like it’s just not a fun place to live.

Tamar: No,

Lane: No like that right there stops me from even going close to it. That, that just it’s devastating makes me cringe. And I think those emotional hangovers.

Tamar: Yep. Those could, those are risky too.

Lane: Right? The emotional hangovers are deadly. Are you kidding me? I mean, that’s where the thinking, right? That’s where the [00:14:00] depression and then the loops come into play. And then they’re like, oh my God, what am I doing? Is this worth it? I might as well just have another drink. I might as well, you know, I might as well try the dosing.

I might as well try micro-dosing right now because life is shit and I’ve already done this. Right. So let’s go try micro-dosing.

Tamar: I can’t even imagine you microdosing, I’m sorry.

Lane: There’s no microdosing. No, no microdoses. I mean, like I’m like that doesn’t even make sense to me. Yeah. But I guess it’s a thing and people really dig it, but there’s also that’s I would think perhaps a pass.

That could be a little sketchy, and dangerous. Yeah. You know, but I do know people that work with doctors to support their mental health and they do [00:15:00] go down that path. But I, that would be really tough if the doctor said, why don’t we start looking at using, you know, ketamine or MTMA? Um, micro-dosing I don’t know what I would say.

I’d just be like, okay, what’s. What do I do? Because that’s like a free pass. Yeah. That’s a free pass. And then, I want more of that feeling. Yeah. But then I can’t, I don’t know. It’s like, I know that there are, um, I’ve had friends go down that route and they’ve had great relief, but I don’t know how they manage it.

Tamar: Cause we don’t really know. Cause we don’t really know.

Lane: I don’t, I don’t really. I mean they’re under a doctor’s supervision, but are their heads still thinking about it? You know, like, I don’t know how the thinking works around that. I, I need to ask, I need to have some inquiry

Tamar: around this. We need to do a survey.

Lane: A survey, right. It’s just like, what happens with the thinking, or is it that it’s so medicinally, um, uh, useful that it shifts the thinking and you do not want, like, you don’t need that. Right. I mean, that’s where the brain chemistry comes into play and it’s like, every person is different. And

Tamar: for me personally, though, like I can’t even take pain meds, like back medication.

I hurt my back really bad when I was young. And if I tweak it, I can’t go down that road because I will take a full box until it’s gone. Oh. Like anything that makes me caffeine, I’ve been down that path. I was hospitalized like anything that makes me feel even just slightly. Hyper or whatever. And I’ve literally like I’ve given up coffee recently, but kind of, I’m tapering off

Lane: So let’s talk about that. This is, I like where we’re going here with this idea of relapse and then the coffee and caffeine and reaching for things. Because I think there’s something about like when we’re living in emotional wellness and really in our sober, strong selves, really living in recovery, I call it recovery life. We’re not relapsing on caffeine.

We’re not relapsing on, uh, candy bars. We’re not reaching for other things to change the way our emotions are within. So what are relapses for you? Boom chicken strips have not yet.

Tamar: I’m I’m two weeks off the chicken strips. I’ll have, you know, oh, the two great two weeks. Yeah. Okay. Awesome. Food is for me, that, that is, it’s been really good.

I didn’t, I’ve done a lot of work around it because I think that’s something that we have to eat. And I’ve done, you know, we’ve done hypnotherapy. Um, I’ve actually done a set of steps around food. Like I’m really focusing on building a better relationship and not doing the yo-yo dieting. What happens is in my life when I go to one extreme, right?

And I’m going through this right now without the extremes, which is a really different experience for me. So when I want to lose weight, for example, I will go all in. I will do, you know, no carbs, no sugar for three months, and I know how to lose it. But then what happens is, is as soon as I get chicken strips or any other food, that’s delicious, which most, you know, I love food.

As soon as I get something in my mouth that, I can’t, you know, work that will trigger me. It’s instant, like off to the races and I can’t stop. And it’s exactly the same effect as alcohol is for me, which is

Lane: And I think a lot more people struggle with food than are willing to admit to that. Um, and perhaps even like beverages as well,

Tamar: Um

Lane: Examples, they’re raising my hand with the matcha. Okay. Fine decaf coffee. I mean, I can binge on these things, and then they, it leaves me feeling not great about myself. I want to hide in the closet. Oh, And then everything about me changes, like the transformation of addiction is alive and well when I’m in that behavior.

So what, okay. What do you do when you realize you’re in that food? You’re like going for it?

Tamar: I reach out to somebody. Before it was, I’ll reach out later if there are consequences. And to me being tired or feeling like crap was not a consequence. Cause I’m like, oh, well I messed up. That’s okay. I don’t have to tell anybody, but that continues to snowball, unfortunately for me.

So now when I find myself in this emotional state, yep. I will. If I’m really emotional, I’ll reach out to someone right away and I’ll talk about it. I also meditate. Like I really learned to like pull away from what I’m doing and going, okay. Why do I want to cook up a dozen chicken strips right now? And.

I’ll just kind of sit in that, right. And then go and meditate and think of something else. And usually, if I postpone that thought for about five to 10 minutes, then I’m, I’m good. I don’t need it anymore. And there’s always a reason that I need to. And usually, it’s because I want to nominate emotion or I don’t want to feel a certain way.

Yeah. Yeah.

Lane: I want a distraction this morning. I want a distraction. I don’t want to be here right now. I want to be doing something else. I want fun in my life. And that little thing is going to give me three seconds of fun. And then I’m going to feel like a big pile of poo. Yeah. So interesting. It’s the brain and the receptors and the narrow Trent, like everything, it’s just alcoholics.

Complex beings. We are really are

Tamar: And one of the things that I think about a lot now is that typically we like that short term, right? Like the rewards, the instant rewards, the instant gratification. But if you think about it, so for me, Building a healthier lifestyle, which is what I’m working on.

The idea that, okay, I’m doing all this work right now. I’m not fad dying. I’m not doing anything drastic. I’m just being mindful of what I put in my body. I’m stripping things away that don’t align with the life I want to create for myself, looking at that long-term goal of living a healthier life, being able to do what I love to do, and not being tired.

That is much more appealing. And that’s what I want. Whereas I know if I have that short-term reward, like, well, I’m just going to cook up those chicken strips now. And I’m going to start again tomorrow. I know I’m going to feel like garbage

Lane: And there it is. I’m going to start again tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. I’ll put the drink down tomorrow. Yeah. Or that line of Coke or those pills or it’s tomorrow. Yep. But how good do you feel when you reach that end goal?

Tamar: Oh, fantastic.

Lane: Yeah. Right. Like golden living, living my best life. Yeah. That’s I want to live in that state every day, living my best life.

Yeah. Who doesn’t want to do that, but I think this is where addiction or the brain of an alcoholic or somebody who’s afflicted with alcohol use disorder that. The understanding is that it’s a mental illness. [00:23:00] People don’t understand the depth of that. So there’s this, oh, I’m going to drink Diet Coke and it’s gonna be great.

But that Diet Coke is actually emotionally robbing them of their lives. And they’re like, well, what’s wrong with me? And then they go the. What’s wrong with me. And then the doctor says, oh, you’re depressed. And here’s something else that you can take. Right. Instead of getting to the root cause of what’s going on and really investigating life, it’s like, nobody’s taking time to understand their emotional wellness anymore.

It’s just like, come on, come on. I went back like, come on, come on, come on. Yeah. I’d like to stick with it. I’m sick of it. So, you are sick of the, like the relapse thing. I’m sick of this thing that happens. Oh, I’m just depressed. I’m like, well, are you eating well? Are you exercising? Are you calling friends?

Are you taking care of yourself? No. Oh, well, okay. How fun? What do you just drink again? I’m just going to go to the doctor and oh yeah. Now I’m on blah, blah, blah medicine. I feel better like, oh, But yes, I have a huge judgment around this, but it’s, it makes me, uh, I get concerned for the over, like, I look at the global perspective of like humans and if everybody becomes medicated and I’m saying that broad stroke, but you know, I have a 12-year-old and I’m thinking about like, how is he living?

Who are the people that are going better going to employ him who are going to work with him? You know, are they going to be medicated because they can’t handle their emotional wellness. Right. So for me, this is such a bigger conversation. Like let’s take care of the body, the heart, the mind, the brain, the soul, and, and I bet you you’ll be okay.

Like, I bet you, if you do some investigating, you’ll be okay. Sorry. That was a rant.

Tamar: That was a good rant. I like your rants. I was thinking about it while you were talking about that too. Like the altered state, right. For me, I am very like, I can be shy. I’m quiet, but I want, I, sometimes I can be, I’m an introvert-extrovert. So if I need to be an extrovert, I can, I love people. I love talking to people. Right. I get along with people, but I think. When I reached for something outside myself, it’s because I want to be in that state. That’s like outgoing and fun. And I know I’m fun. I mean, you know, I’m fun. Yeah. You’re fun. But I like, I, I feel like sometimes I that’s why I’ll like reach for caffeine or I used to have energy drinks.

Cause I’m like, I want to be like the life of the party again. And I want to be hyper and I want to be outgoing, but I honestly like, I like who I am right now. Yes. Right. Yes. I don’t have to be hyper. No, like, I, I don’t, you know, we used to have these weekends where we eat all the sugar and stuff like that.

And it became like a running thing. Like, look at Tamar, like there she goes, right. I’m like, do I really want to be that person? Like, I’m glad that you’re having fun watching me get completely hopped up on and wasted on sugar, but I don’t feel good the next day.

Lane: Oh, Right. So your hangovers are the worst ice cream hangovers.

Oh, you get all fluffy. And that is just so bad. No, thank you. No,

Tamar: sorry. But you know, that’s why I wanted to talk about relapse because I think there are so many things that can lead to a relapse. And I just,

Lane: Yeah, let’s talk about what, what leads to it. Right. So anxiousness irritability, and a boss that doesn’t pay you enough.

What else let’s give, give some ideas, uh, a parent or a partner who’s just like boring.

Tamar: Secrets.

Lane: Yes. Secrets, but what kind of secrets?

Tamar: Secrets that you’re doing? Things that, you know, you shouldn’t be doing an

Lane: Example, please.

Tamar: Okay. Well, uh, I mean worst case you’re having an affair, right?

Lane: Okay. Okay. That’s a bad secret. That is a really bad secret. I know people. I know like this is okay. Keep going.

Tamar: It’s true. Right? Because we still act out, even though we’re sober, we still do like, I, you know, Pay attention to our reels on Instagram, because some of these may be real-life examples. Some of them may not be, some of them are just pure fun, but I think I told you before, as the smoking, right.

I would smoke. Right. And I was like, I felt terrible. Like I felt like I was two different people and I’m like, why am I hiding this? Those kinds of things could make somebody relapse

Lane: Watching porn.

Tamar: Yeah. I never thought about that one.

Lane: Yeah. Yeah. I had some, this was a big issue. It was becoming problematic. Yeah. Yeah. It was dangerous ground. And really having to learn how to set boundaries and how to manage that. Right. That’s another need. That’s not getting met somehow in some way. So turning into an addiction.

Tamar: The internet, social media. So show me, oh, yes. Don’t stop watching our reels.

Lane: Uh, overeating is a secret.

Yes. For a lot of people, that’s a big secret. They don’t want to own it. They don’t want to talk about it. Um, my. Was a secret for a long time, like three, three a day. That was a secret. I wasn’t gonna tell anybody that was really hard to manage until my husband was like, you just spent $600. What are you doing?

Like I did. What do you mean? Right. So then what do I do? I start paying cash for it.

Tamar: Secret behaviors.

Lane: Yeah. That like not okay. Right. Uh, What’s another good

Tamar: secret. I used to actually drive home from work and if I was stressed out, I would stop by McDonald’s. I haven’t eaten at McDonald’s for a long time now, but I used to stop and then park in the parking lot, scarf down a meal, pull [00:30:00] over to throw it in the garbage can, and go home and have dinner.

And I would force myself to have dinner because I did not want my spouse to know that I had just had dinner in the parking lot. Uh, huh. Cause I could not be evidence. Right, right.

Lane: You got rid of that. Yeah. That’s a good secret. That’s a really good secret yeah. Secrets, uh, will lead you to drink again. Yeah.

Emotional bandwidth, not having the bandwidth to properly assess your emotions will lead you to drink family. Um, relationships will lead you to. Um, and I haven’t, I haven’t like having mail be late. Right. Having some package be late or something like anything can set off the alarm in the body. So it’s really building the fence, then making sure you’re steady and sturdy.

So when those emotional, um, bombs go off, you’re safe and the propeller. And you’re not going to be drinking and sharing like that.

Tamar: And that’s one of the things that I’ve gotten really good at over the last. And this, this is probably only been the last few months, is that when I am feeling emotional, I reach out right away.

I never used to do that. It takes time. Yeah. Time takes time. It takes time, takes time.

Lane: You can listen to that podcast.

Tamar: It’s always the first step. Yes.

Lane: Uh, I got lost with my thought now. Great. Hmm.

Sharing is caring, picking up the drink is the last action in relapse. Taking care of your emotional wellness is a priority. Number one, so you don’t get all backed up and jacket. Anything else we can share today?

Tamar: Community.

Lane: Oh yeah. Community. Oh my God. Friends, the community being a part of something. Yep.

Tamar: Life-changing I have women that I talk to every day and my recovery circle and it just. It just, I dunno it, like you were saying, right. Building that fence and that sturdiness, that foundation, having community and having people in your life that you can actually reach out to, or be in the middle of the boat, so to speak.

Right. I stepped outside that and I’m like, no, I’m just going to go out here for a little bit. No, that didn’t do me any good. And I could have easily relapsed.

Lane: Yeah, friends, community being a part of something being of service being in, being in your life in a very honest way. Right? I mean, I think that’s where we’re like what I teach around the mindfulness and being present at the moment with somebody like you can’t drink.

If you’re not present with something like you can’t, it doesn’t work. It just doesn’t. That’s right. Like, I’m not going to drink right now because I’m with you here on this podcast, right? Like I’m with you, I’m being present. I’m being honest.

Tamar: Well, I would hope not because I’m a little far away, so I’m like, I’ll see you in seven hours.

Lane: No, not going to happen, not going to happen. No. Uh, so yeah, relapse does not have to be a part of the storyline. Yeah, it doesn’t have to be, uh, we know that it doesn’t have to be. And if it does, if it is a part of your story, no shame, like you’re sober today.

Tamar: Exactly.

Lane: I think this is a conversation that we’re just ranting and raving. So I’ll wrap it up.

Tamar: Wrap it up.

Lane: What are we going to put on it today? The corncob pop pop pop.

You watch. Holy moly. No. Okay. Holy moly is Steph Curry’s miniature golf show and it’s kind of outrageous. And one of the obstacles in this cob of corn and you have to run by it before the kernels pop. And it’s, it’s so funny. So we’re, we’re putting a big old cob of corn here before.

There you go.

Tamar: Yeah, there you go. That’s a wrap. Oh. Um, before we go. Uh, if you have any questions, right? So what we want to start doing is if you go to our website, which is www.youresobernowwhat.com in the top right-hand corner. There’s a little ask us. There is, yeah, there is. Yes. So really go to that. Lane’s going there right now. Land’s going to ask our first question and suggest our first. And yeah. Oh my God. I love this. Yeah, I know. I figured you surprise. That’s awesome. And you can ask us a question and we’ll give you a shout-out on the show. So before the shows, if we have some questions, we’ll answer those for you.

But if you have a topic that you want us to talk about, we’ll discuss it. Cause right. We come at it from two different times in our recovery. And I think we have two different viewpoints, right? Yeah. And it’ll be fun. I mean, that’s the point of the show is to have fun and just conversation.

Lane: Conversation, but also, uh, speaking of community, that’s such a huge part of being in recovery is having that community, making sure that you check out, uh, the options that are available to join the connected, calm life and the SOS you get to practice once a month with yours. Truly. I hope you’ll join me.

Lane: That’s incredible. Oh, but you could join for as little as a chai latte.

TIME TAKES TIME: Check out this monthly panel hosted by Connected Calm Life Coach & Sober Curator Lane Kennedy. On the 1st Thursday of every month, you can listen to or watch one full hour of content featuring a rotating panel of guests who are in long-term recovery from substance abuse disorders. Our definition of long-term recovery is 10+ or more years.

You can also check out the TIME TAKES TIME series on YouTube

SOBER SPOTLIGHT: Tamar Medford, Relapse Prevention Strategist and Host of You’re Sober! Now What? Podcast

A Disco Ball is Hundreds of Pieces of Broken Glass, Put Together to Make a Magical Ball of Light. You are NOT Broken, Friend. You are a DISCO BALL!

Resources Are Available

If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.