Author: Patti Clark

A lot of people think that by the time they hit 50, it’s too late to change. That the damage is done. That they’re too set in their ways, too far gone, too old to start over … blah, blah, blah …But to that I say: Hell no! I got sober the first time at 29 — two days before my 30th birthday. I was sober for almost 13 years, through pregnancy, breastfeeding, and the beautiful, exhausting early years of raising children. Then, at some point, I lost myself and became lost in the abyss of alcohol for over 13…

“We can’t be arrogant about our existence. Life is a wonder, a gift, a profound blessing.”Sam Levinson Levinson said: “I spent the majority of my teenage years in hospitals, rehabs and halfway houses. Sometime around the age of 16, I resigned myself to the idea that eventually drugs would kill me and there was no reason to fight it. I would let it take me over, and I had made peace with that … but at 19, I checked into rehab to get off opiates and on a more ‘productive’ drug like crystal meth! But, while I was in rehab,…

A thoughtful sober perspective on Rose Byrne’s intense portrayal of addiction and recovery. How this film captures the reality of addictive behaviors and emotional strain.

Sobriety is often framed as a personal journey—one of healing and self-discovery. And although that is very true, my sobriety really shone when I reflected on how it impacted all of my relationships. Every relationship I had, from family and friends to my closest intimate relationship, underwent a profound transformation when I got sober. Sobriety doesn’t just change your habits — it reshapes your relationships, something we see again and again in sober celebrities and real-life recovery stories. As therapist Dr. Robert Weiss notes, “Trust is rebuilt not through words, but through consistent, predictable behavior over time.” Sobriety provides the…

When I was a teenager, my mother died of alcoholism. For a year before she died, my mother’s skin and eyes were yellow, not sallow and looking a bit unhealthy, but real yellow, like the butter cups on the wallpaper in our kitchen. I didn’t know why this was happening. There was no internet then, so no way to look something up online, and it was far too shameful to ask for help.   The way I dealt with my fear and shame was to drink a lot and do copious amounts of drugs. Thank goodness, I eventually found my way into recovery so…

The Dark Side of Addiction … and the Light at the End of the Tunnel I started writing this piece as a simple review of the book and series ‘The Death of Bunny Munro’ but it turned out to be not that simple. To review this story, I think one has to dive deep into the author, Nick Cave, to see what lies behind it. A simple review would go something like this: Nick Cave’s “The Death of Bunny Munro” is a novel and series that looks starkly at addiction. It isn’t treated as a subplot or a psychological quirk; no,…

“Will took that risk of having that hard conversation with me in, like, July of 2004 and that put me on a path of deciding to change my life. It truly was Will Arnett. He is the reason.”-Bradley Cooper (on choosing sobriety) The movie “Is This Thing On?” has a lot of people talking about marriage and relationships… it got me thinking about relationships, too, but not the one with a marriage partner; instead, I was thinking about the relationship between Bradley Cooper and Will Arnett.  Bradley Cooper has publicly credited his long-time friend Will Arnett with helping him confront his struggles with drugs…

I grew up in the 1960s and 70s. And Dick Van Dyke was a mainstay on our TV. He was one of my favorite actors. I loved his TV show with Mary Tyler Moore. And of course, he was wonderful as the sweet chimney sweep in Mary Poppins. His life on TV and film seemed so happy and calm compared to the chaos I was growing up with, in my dysfunctional home with my alcoholic parents. Little did I know that Van Dyke quietly struggled with addiction as well. He has admitted in interviews that he started drinking as a…

“The opposite of addiction is not sobriety, it’s connection.”Johann Hari  I got sober the first time in Tucson, Arizona, two days before my 30th birthday. I had a wonderful support system of like-minded women who nurtured me and helped me find my feet in early sobriety. Then after several years clean and sober, my husband and I moved to New Zealand. It was a huge move for me — away from my sister, who is also in recovery, and away from my supportive group of sober friends. I was full of grief and fear at losing my connections. After a…

I loved this book! It captures the absolutely insane nature of co-dependency. This book is for anyone who has ever dealt with the crazy-making behavior of their own, or a loved one’s co-dependency. This isn’t just a book; it is an experience not to be missed. Dr. Michaud’s writing is both lyrical and raw, capturing the nuances of the human spirit. I felt like I was sitting over a cup of tea with her, while she shared her own story and the tools she has used herself and offered to the people she has worked with. As someone who has…

“Hank, why do you drink? Hank, why do roll smoke? Why must you live out the songs that you wrote? Stop and think it over Try to put yourself in my unique position If I get stoned and sing all night long It’s a family tradition” Family Tradition, Song by Hank Williams Jr.   As I was reading an article in The Guardian about Sir Anthony Hopkins talking about his memoir and his addiction, I thought about a line he used:   “Drinking was a family tradition … ” And boy, could I relate! First of all, I couldn’t help but hear Hank Williams Jr.’s song in my head about his own family tradition, referring to his father, Hank Williams Sr.’s alcoholism and addiction to pain killers which eventually led to…

A nerdy look at a great reason to stay sober!

When I was in my 20s and bartending in Alaska (yeah, talk about a kid in the candy shop!), I had a T-shirt that said: So many men, so little time! I thought that was so funny — now I can’t believe I actually wore that! Then, in my 30s, raising two young children, I had a T-shirt that said: So many books, so little time! (I would wear that one if I still had it.)    But through it all, the T-shirt that would have been the most appropriate is: So many addictions, so little time! Addiction was never just…