In the latest episode of The Sober Curator, Kate Vitela sits down with Todd Kinney, an attorney, father of four, husband, and author of the inspiring book “I Didn’t Believe It Either.” The episode offers listeners a deep dive into Kinney’s journey to sobriety, his challenges with drinking, and the unexpected joys he discovered in an alcohol-free life.
Todd Kinney’s decision to quit drinking didn’t come overnight. It was a gradual realization, bolstered by therapy, which led him to mark the significant transition between three to six months of sobriety. Initially, Kinney had reservations about joining a support group; however, during the COVID-19 pandemic, he found a virtual haven in the Luckiest Club—an online congregation of over 200 members with stories echoing his own. Without a formal program like AA, he found community support crucial to his new path.
Todd’s bravery in sharing his experience with sobriety was met with a humbling response from others who related to his saga, a testament to the pervasive challenge of alcoholism that many face in silence. He discusses the particular stigma for men, addressing the pressure to conform to archetypical male behaviors that often involve drinking. In abandoning alcohol, Todd felt as though he was giving up part of his manhood, a barrier he hopes to dismantle through his writing, encouraging more open discussion among men.
One of the most profound revelations from the interview was the unexpected benefits Todd found in a life devoid of alcohol. Relationships with his children flourished, a newfound serenity seeped into his daily life, and personal connections deepened. Alcohol, which had once loomed large over his existence, left behind space for more genuine experiences and engagements. In essence, Kinney discovered that the fear of missing out reveled in by alcohol’s allure was, indeed, nothing more than a mirage.
During the conversation, Kate Vitela brought in her own experiences, sharing a night of revelry at a house party she enjoyed while sober. This further highlighted the unanticipated contentment sobriety can offer. Her insights into this transformed happiness setpoint melded seamlessly with Kinney’s own.
From tailgating to attending weddings, Todd Kinney now finds greater pleasure in these social scenarios without the haze of alcohol. He candidly shared his journey of writing the book “I Didn’t Believe It Either,” which began a year after he stopped drinking and took around two and a half years to complete. Resonant in the title itself is Kinney’s initial skepticism about life sans alcohol and the surpassing fulfillment he discovered within it.
Listeners will learn that their resistance to missing out may dissolve into gratitude for the peace and tranquility that sobriety can grant. As Todd Kinney’s example illustrates, relinquishing alcohol can unravel into a richer, more mindful participation in life’s tapestry—a narrative The Sober Curator is passionate about sharing.
The episode concludes with a conversation about the book’s availability and the possibility of an audiobook in the future—a prospect Todd Kinney finds appealing. Kate Vitela wraps up the interview with heartfelt thanks, ensuring listeners that Todd’s contact information and further details will be available in the show notes.
Todd Kinney’s message is one of hope and encouragement. His story offers strength to those on the fence about their relationship with alcohol, and his book serves as a beacon of possibility. “I Didn’t Believe It Either” is more than a title; it’s a statement of the beautiful reality awaiting beyond the veil of alcohol dependence. In this episode of The Sober Curator, listeners will find not only Todd Kinney’s compelling narrative but also a wealth of resources and shared experiences that underscore the mission of the podcast: to illuminate the path to sobriety and the richness of life that awaits on the other side of addiction.
Sober Spotlight Interview with Kate Vitela: Todd Kinney, Author of “I Didn’t Believe It Either”
Timestamped Overview:
- 00:00 Person reflects on recovery from alcoholism, considers writing memoir.
- 05:32 Initially hesitant about quitting drinking, now finds sobriety to be fulfilling.
- 07:29 Realizing benefits of quitting drinking from others’ experience.
- 12:08 Attended supportive meetings, found help & friends.
- 15:06 Nervous but glad to share story on social media, connected with others.
- 19:15 Alcohol-free life enhances genuine connections over drinking.
- 22:31 Realizing alcohol’s impact, breaks helped before quitting.
- 26:51 Reflection and sobriety improved parenting and reduced conflict.
- 29:15 The speaker talks about a fun, sober house party with TLC members in Seattle and how life has changed.
- 31:28 Enjoyed alcohol-free night of fun with friends at a wedding; finding joy in old activities.
- 35:34 Getting advice on book writing, considering audiobook.
About Todd Kinney
Todd is an attorney who lives in Omaha, NE with his wife, four kids and two wiener dogs. In his free time, he enjoys traveling, golf, hanging out with his family (when they let him) and spending an unhealthy amount of time and money supporting the Iowa Hawkeyes. He quit drinking in 2019 and considers it the best thing he’s ever done for himself or his family.
“I Didn’t Believe It Either” by Todd Kinney Synopsis
Todd was a classic gray area drinker who looked like he had it all together on the outside. But on the inside, he was tormented by his relationship with alcohol. He loved drinking and being the life of the party, yet there was so much about drinking he didn’t like: the control it had on him, how it consumed his every thought, and how he felt after drinking too much.
He spent six years evaluating his relationship with alcohol and employing every moderation hack in the book. Some of them worked but were exhausting, and the victories were always short-lived.
By 2019, Todd was growing tired of fighting his internal battle. The constant negotiating and obsessing wore him down, and he was sick of the torment, shame, and regret. Then, in the fall of that year, his wife whispered something into his ear that would change his life forever. He decided to quit drinking.
Giving up alcohol was scary and overwhelming. Even though Todd knew it was the right decision, he also thought life without alcohol would be a little dull, a bit like a prison sentence for not being able to “drink like a normal person.”
However, he discovered that giving it up was the farthest thing from a prison sentence. “I Didn’t Believe It Either” is the raw, honest, vulnerable, and sometimes funny story of Todd’s journey to quitting the one thing he thought he couldn’t live without and his discovery that sobriety is better than he ever imagined.
The Sobees #QUITLIT Score: 3 out of 5
Where to find Todd Kinny:
- Website: Todd Kinney | I Didn’t Believe It Either | Road to Sobriety
- Instagram @tkinney111
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