There is a Diet Coke can in a gift bag in Tacoma with a single birthday candle stuck in it.
That is, somehow, exactly right.
We’ll get to the bag. First, let me tell you about May 1, 2006.
👉Prefer listening? Press play and follow along.
I woke up that morning and decided I was done. Done with hangovers. Done with mystery bruises. Done with reading my own texts with one eye closed, hoping for the best. Done with the version of my life that kept shrinking every time I thought it was expanding.
I had no idea what I was saying yes to. I just knew what I was saying no to.
Twenty years later, I am writing this from inside a life I could not have pictured that morning. I ran a magazine. I raised a kid by myself. I built The Sober Curator from nothing into the thing you are reading right now. And last week, my friend Stephanie — who owns Sober AF Bottle Shop in Tacoma — called me and said, “I picked out everything you actually love from the shop, and I’m building you a birthday kit.” Awe schucks. Stephanie is the nicest.
#ADDTOCART – Welcome to Your Summer Starter Pack
The kit is called the AB That’s Me Birthday Kit, and it is available right now at Sober AF Bottle Shop in Tacoma. Yes, they ship. And the price includes shipping. My sobirthday wish is that you will help me celebrate another woman in sobriety who is running a small business by purchasing one of the kits she put together. I’m just the inspiration; all of the profit goes to her and helps her continue to keep the sober lights on in Tacoma.
AB. That’s me. Twenty years sober, and I finally have a gift bag with my initials on it to prove it. **Please note that my initials are NOT on the tote bag you’ll receive when you purchase the kit. That would be weird. I’m not Anine Bing. (But I am a fan of AB, obviously.)
Here is everything in the bag.
The Drinks
Hans Kombucha, Cheers Queers White Peach Champagne
My favorite kombucha on the planet. Peachy, dry, slightly fizzy, and the name is everything.
Noli South Kombucha, Dragon Fruit Hops
The can has a leopard on it, which is reason enough to buy it. The dragon fruit and hops combo is unexpected and excellent.
Mingle Mocktails, Cranberry Cosmo
The Cosmo had its Sex and the City moment twenty years ago. Mingle redid it for the alcohol-free era, and the cranberry is sharp instead of syrupy.
Trip Mindful Blend, Cherry Lemon
Lightly sparkling, lightly functional, very crushable. Trip is one of those brands that actually feels like an upgrade, not a substitute.
Relax Sparkling Kava, Passionfruit Orange & Guava
Sparkling cava in tropical fruit form. Pop one open and pretend you are on a balcony in Tulum instead of in your kitchen on a Tuesday.
Diet Coke
The OG. The eternal. The drink I have been ordering at every bar, every restaurant, every airport, and every wedding for two decades. There had to be one in this bag. It is the candle on the cake.
The Glitter Department
The Glitter Lab, Cherry Bomb
A cotton candy poof infused with sparkle and a hint of juicy cherry. You drop it in your drink and watch it melt into red glitter with a pink iridescent shimmer. Your mocktail is now a science experiment. It is also incredible. You’re welcome.
Woodstove Kitchen Glitter Simple Syrup
Small batch. Real edible glitter. The thing that turns a regular pour of NA bubbly into a moment. I am constantly adding this to my at-home mocktails on basically any day of the week that ends in day.
The Snacks
Birthday Cake Popcorn
Tastes like a kid’s birthday party in a bag. No notes. I love birthday cake flavor, anything and everything. Fun fact, Stephanie actually tried to come up with a birthday cake-flavored cocktail recipe, but after many attempts and a few tears, we went in a different direction. That’s how much heart Stephanie has as a small business owner!
The Extras
Don’t Forget to Have Fun Tote
The tagline is the whole reminder. I forgot how to have fun for years. Now I overcorrect.
Girl Dinner: Snack Inspiration for Girls Who Love to Graze
Yes, this is in the bag. Yes, you will read it. Yes, you will start treating dinner like a charcuterie board built from whatever you found in your pantry.
Party in a Bottle
A tiny bottle styled exactly like a prescription bottle. The label says, “100 mg, use in case of celebration, repeat as needed.” Petty. Funny. Iconic.
Motel Paper, “Who Needs Cake? Have a Crispy Birthday!” Card
A card from Motel Paper in Los Angeles. The front is a Diet Coke can with a single birthday candle stuck in it. The inside says “Who Needs Cake? Have a Crispy Birthday!” (I see what my subconscious is doing. My subconscious does not care.)
Stickers
You know I will not let you leave without stickers. My laptop is 80% stickers and 20% laptop. (Read: Sticker Books for Adults: Sober Art Therapy to Feed Your Inner Child)
About Sober AF Bottle Shop
If you have not been yet, fix that. It is a Pacific Northwest bottle shop dedicated entirely to non-alcoholic drinks. Real NA wine. Functional sparkling. Kombucha. Mocktail mixers. The whole zero-proof catalog you cannot find at Safeway. Stephanie built something that should not have to be rare and somehow still is. Plus, she throws the most fun gatherings, from paint and sip, to LEGO and play, to drag bingo, karaoke, Mahjong, and more!
How to Order
The AB That’s Me Birthday Kit is live now at Sober AF Bottle Shop in Tacoma, and yes, they ship. #ADDTOCART RIGHT HERE The price includes shipping. $149 value for only $99 AND you support a fellow sober business owner.
Grab one for yourself. Grab one for a friend hitting a milestone. Grab one for someone who is sober-curious and needs a starter pack that does not look like a hospital gift bag.
If you tag me when you crack one open, I will reshare it everywhere.
Twenty Years
I think about her sometimes. The woman who woke up on May 1, 2006 and decided she was done.
She had no idea. She could not have pictured any of this. Not the magazine. Not the kid. Not The Sober Curator. Not the glitter bomb birthday bag at a bottle shop in Tacoma built by a friend who wanted to make the anniversary match the life.
That is the part nobody tells you about getting sober. The version of your life you cannot picture yet is usually the one waiting for you on the other side of the decision.
Twenty years in. Still curating. Still on no days off. Still ordering Diet Cokes like it is my job.
Happy sobirthday to me.
XOXO,
AB
#NODAYSOFF #SOBERNOTBORING #ODAAT
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SOBER IN THE CITY – TACOMA: Mahjong, but Make It Sober and Sexy
Welcome to HAPPY EVERY HOUR, your go-to hub for all things NA (non-alcoholic). We review alcohol-free beers, ciders, wines, spirits, RTDs (ready-to-drink), and share NA cocktail recipes that taste just as good—if not better—than the boozy originals. Whether you’re sober, sober-curious, or just taking a break, this is where great taste meets zero proof.
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Q: What is the AB That’s Me Birthday Kit?
A: A curated non-alcoholic gift kit put together by Stephanie at Sober AF Bottle Shop in Tacoma, Washington, in honor of Alysse Bryson’s 20th sobriety anniversary. The kit includes non-alcoholic drinks, glitter cocktail additions, snacks, a tote bag, a book, a party novelty, stickers, and a birthday card from Motel Paper in Los Angeles.
Q: Where can I buy the AB That’s Me Birthday Kit?
A: The kit is available at Sober AF Bottle Shop in Tacoma, Washington. They ship, so you don’t have to be local to order one.
Q: Who is Alysse Bryson?
A: Alysse Bryson is the founder and publisher of The Sober Curator, a sober media company covering pop culture, lifestyle, entertainment, and non-alcoholic drinks. She has been sober since May 1, 2006. She was formerly publisher of Seattle Met magazine and director of business development at KING 5 NBC.
Q: What drinks are included in the kit?
A: The kit includes Hans Kombucha Cheers Queers White Peach Champagne, Noli South Kombucha Dragon Fruit Hops, Mingle Mocktails Cranberry Cosmo, Trip Mindful Blend Cherry Lemon, Relax Sparkling Cava Passion Fruit Orange Guava, and a Diet Coke.
Q: What is Sober AF Bottle Shop?
A: Sober AF Bottle Shop is a bottle shop in Tacoma, Washington dedicated entirely to non-alcoholic drinks. It carries NA wine, functional sparkling beverages, kombucha, mocktail mixers, and a full zero-proof catalog.
Q: Is this kit only for people in long-term sobriety?
A: Not at all. The kit works for anyone celebrating a sober milestone, anyone who is sober-curious, or anyone who just wants a gift that doesn’t revolve around alcohol. It also makes an excellent gift for someone you want to celebrate without defaulting to a bottle of wine.
Q: Why Diet Coke?
A: Alysse has been ordering Diet Coke at every bar, restaurant, airport, and wedding for twenty years. It’s not a consolation prize. It’s the original.
Q: What is the Motel Paper card in the kit?
A: A birthday card from Motel Paper, a stationery company in Los Angeles. The front features a Diet Coke can with a single birthday candle stuck in it. The inside reads “Who Needs Cake? Have a Crispy Birthday!” It wasn’t designed for this kit. It was just exactly right.
Q: Can I tag Alysse when I receive my kit?
A: Yes. Tag her and she will reshare it everywhere.
