I found Monica Madrid the way I find most of my favorite humans lately: she followed us on Instagram, I clicked her page out of curiosity, and then I did not leave my phone for twenty minutes.
Football is sexy. That was the account name. Not a sobriety account. Not a recovery account. A sexy football account, run by a woman who, it turns out, has one of the wildest “how did I get here” stories I have ever heard on this show.
Here is the short version, because I am not giving you the long version. The long version is the episode.
Monica was supposed to be a pop star. She danced on Soul Train for four years. She was in the room with Prince, with Vanity, with Rick James, chasing an Interscope deal that felt like a sure thing. And then Interscope signed someone else instead. A guy named Tupac Shakur.
You read that correctly. Tupac got the deal Monica wanted.
She talks about it now the way you talk about a breakup you are grateful for, which is to say, with the specific kind of relief that only comes years later. Her ex-girlfriend once told her she was glad Monica didn’t get that record deal, because she didn’t think Monica would have survived it. Monica agreed. Sit with that for a second, because I did, live, on the mic, and I got a little teary.
She got sober at 40. Eighteen years ago now. And the years right after were not a straight line up. She calls it an emotional detox. She moved to Nashville knowing nobody. She lost her dad. For two years after he died, she couldn’t even go to a Niners game, and if you know anything about this woman, you know that is a big deal.
What happened next is the part of the episode I actually can’t give away, because it is one of the best answers to “what was the turning point” that I have ever gotten on this show. It involves a woman’s meeting, a stranger’s grief, and a kind of gratitude that Monica says she didn’t understand until years later, sitting across from Tamar and me, figuring it out in real time on the mic. She cried. I cried. Tamar tried to make a football joke to bring us back from the five yard line. It did not fully work.
Here is what I will tell you: that meeting is the reason Football Is Sexy exists.
Monica spent thirty years in the mortgage business after the music thing didn’t pan out. Rates went up, she got tired, and she heard what she calls “the voice” for the third time in her life. The first time it told her to stop drinking. The second time it told her to move to Nashville. The third time it told her to teach football.
So she posted on Facebook. Free football lesson, this time, this pizza place, no experience necessary. She built a playbook, designed a logo she still uses today, and did the whole thing in twelve steps, because, in her words, twelve steps had worked for her before.
Forty women showed up to a pizza parlor to learn football from a woman who had never coached anything in her life. She filmed it. She watched it back that night and knew she was onto something.
Three seasons later, Football Is Sexy has well over a hundred thousand followers, thousands of male followers included, two Super Bowl trips under her belt, and a business Monica built by quitting a good paying job to bet on herself in a sport, and an industry, that was not built with her in mind.
She is gay. She is sober. She is over 50 and just came out about that too, in a caption, because apparently fifty was the hardest thing to admit to the internet. She told us that more people give her grief for being a 49ers fan than for being gay or sober, which, if you know sports fans, tracks.
Tamar and Monica get into something in this episode that I did not expect. Both of them came out as gay years into their sobriety, not at the same time, and they talk about what it actually felt like to carry two closets at once, and why sobriety cracked one door open before the other one followed. It is one of the more honest conversations we have had on this show, and I am not going to summarize it for you, because it deserves to be heard in full, not skimmed in an article.
Monica told us she has never been asked some of these questions before. Eighteen years sober, dozens of podcasts about football under her belt, and this was the first time someone asked her about the sobriety underneath the whole thing.
That is kind of our whole deal here.
Sober Shots with Monica did not disappoint either. Let’s just say Lenny Kravitz makes an appearance he did not sign up for.
Press play. Get the pizza parlor origin story in her own words, the full dad story, the coming out story times two, and find out exactly what “the voice” told her that she has still never told anyone else.
Getting sober matters. Staying sober matters more.
Follow Monica @footballissexy on IG
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Who is Monica Madrid?
Monica Madrid is the founder of Football Is Sexy, a platform and community that helps women understand and enjoy football. Before launching the business, she worked in the mortgage industry and pursued a career in music and entertainment.
What is Football Is Sexy?
Football Is Sexy is a football education and lifestyle platform created by Monica Madrid. It began with a free football lesson for women at a pizza parlor, where 40 people showed up to learn the game.
How did Monica Madrid get started in the music industry?
Monica danced on Soul Train for four years and pursued a career as a recording artist. She was close to securing a deal with Interscope Records before the label signed Tupac Shakur instead.
When did Monica Madrid get sober?
Monica got sober at age 40. In the podcast episode, she discusses the emotional adjustment that followed, the loss of her father and how sobriety helped her begin rebuilding her life.
How did sobriety influence Football Is Sexy?
Monica says the idea to teach football came through an inner voice similar to the one that had previously told her to stop drinking and move to Nashville. She even organized her first football lesson into 12 steps because the 12-step framework had worked for her in recovery.
What does Monica discuss in the podcast episode?
Monica discusses sobriety, grief, her music career, losing a record deal to Tupac, coming out later in life and building Football Is Sexy. She also shares how her father’s death and a meaningful recovery meeting helped shape the business she eventually created.
Is Football Is Sexy only for women?
Football Is Sexy was created to make football more accessible and welcoming to women, but its audience also includes thousands of men. The platform is designed for anyone who wants to better understand and enjoy the sport.
Why should listeners hear Monica Madrid’s story?
Monica’s story connects sobriety, identity, grief, career reinvention and the courage to begin again. It offers a powerful example of how an unexpected disappointment can eventually lead to a more meaningful path.
