Restaurant operator and breathwork instructor Cesar Vallin joins the Sober Curator Podcast to share transformative insights on choosing clarity, building resilience, and living a fulfilling sober lifestyle—one cold plunge at a time.
The Pivotal Moment: Facing the Truth About Substance Use
On the latest episode of The Sober Curator, host Alysse Bryson, co-host Kim Parsley, and guest Cesar Vallin dive headfirst into the complexities and revelations of sobriety, especially when it comes to working in environments where drinking is often considered the norm. Cesar, known for his entrepreneurial ventures like San Diego’s Cloak and Petal and for embracing cutting-edge wellness routines, shares a deeply personal story of his first New Year’s Eve after committing to sobriety.
It wasn’t a dramatic intervention or a public rock bottom that awakened Cesar, but rather an intimate, visceral response to a glass of premium tequila. As he describes holding—then contemplating—a shot of 1942, he’s struck by an outpouring of emotion and flashbacks to solitary, destructive drinking. The internal debate mirrored that familiar “life flashing before your eyes” near-death experience. “It’s not about now, it’s about tomorrow. How will you feel about this tomorrow?” a friend observed, nudging him toward self-awareness. It was this moment that Cesar reclaimed agency over his life, recognizing not only his alcoholism, but a deeper pattern of self-medication across substances.
Sobriety in a Booze-Fueled Industry
Hospitality is infused with celebration—and often with alcohol. So, how does someone in Cesar’s position navigate such a charged environment, day in and day out? Surprisingly, Cesar insists that abstaining is easy now, but it’s less about battling temptation and more about cultivating presence and authenticity.
He notes that many of the social pressures around drinking stem from unresolved trauma and social anxiety, which he’s learned to manage through vulnerability, professional development, and routine. He’s invested heavily in personal growth, attending emotional intelligence workshops and training in modalities like Wim Hof breathwork. It’s this multidimensional approach—not just giving up alcohol, but engaging deeply with clarity and self-examination—that has fueled his continued professional and personal success.
A New Way to Lead: Sobriety and Business Transformation
For a long time, Cesar admits, sobriety didn’t immediately “fix” his business habits. He brought old patterns—impatience, narcissism, lashing out—into his ventures. But sobriety offered the foundation to evolve into a leader with genuine emotional intelligence, empathy, and a willingness to accept feedback. Consulting and business growth followed as an organic byproduct of this transformation.
“I’ve developed, through my experiences, into a tour guide. I could take you to a place where most travel agents have never traveled,” Cesar explains, highlighting the authenticity and lived wisdom he brings to his clients. Habits, routines, and honest self-inquiry are as vital as sound business systems in entrepreneurial growth.
Breathwork and Cold Plunges: Tools for Resilience
Cesar’s daily routine includes Wim Hof breathwork and cold plunges, practices he attributes to fostering the mindfulness and composure that sobriety first unlocked. His morning breathwork ritual grounds him, helping him gracefully process stress, loss, and adversity. These “habit stacks” aren’t just about physical health—they’re crucial for maintaining mental clarity and emotional resilience, especially during life’s most challenging stretches.
He doesn’t promote these practices as cure-alls or obligations; rather, they’re anchors that help him navigate both personal and professional storms. He’s witnessed firsthand their transformative influence on family life, with even his children participating in breathwork and cold plunging.
Embracing Change in Hospitality: The Rise of Non-Alcoholic Menus
As a restaurateur, Cesar observes that the hospitality industry is slowly transforming, too. Cloak and Petal’s non-alcoholic offerings have expanded from a single beer to a dedicated menu section with multiple cocktails and zero-proof beers. While alcohol sales remain dominant, demand for sober options is growing, especially among younger generations. The new sober-curious movement, Cesar predicts, mirrors the decades-long shift in attitudes towards smoking.
“It’s not about being better or worse; it’s about having options,” he reflects, echoing Alysse’s excitement over the increasing visibility of creative, festive, alcohol-free drinks in mainstream restaurants.
From Ordinary to Extraordinary: Defining Fun in Sobriety
In closing, Cesar embodies a profoundly rewarding sober lifestyle rooted in presence, family, and simple pleasures—like indulging a sweet tooth with his loved ones or savoring quiet moments with his dog. Once overshadowed by high-octane nightlife, these everyday joys now define his sense of fun and fulfillment.
His message is clear: sobriety isn’t just about abstaining from substances. It’s about building a life that embraces all the “ordinary” moments—and turns them into something extraordinary.
Connect with Cesar Vallin
You can follow Cesar’s journey and updates about his wellness platform “Ready For All” on Instagram at @cesar_readyforall. If you’re in San Diego, swing by Cloak and Petal, and stay tuned for his upcoming ventures blending Japanese and Latino subcultures.
Getting sober is one thing—but staying sober? That’s where the real adventure begins.
This show is for you if you’ve ever wondered:
– Where can I find inspiring sober podcasts, apps, and creators?
– How do I give back or stay plugged into the sober community
– What are the best sober-friendly drinks and travel tips?
– Where do I find the good NA drinks that don’t taste like regret?
The Sober Curator is your go-to for sober pop culture, booze-free travel, apps, creators, and community.
We’re not here to help you get sober.
We’re here to help you live sober—and love it.
Therapist, author and media pro Kelley Kitley joins Alysse to unpack “gray area” drinking, stigma around labels and what long-term recovery really feels like — including a visceral craving moment and the simple, honest tools that kept her sober. They also dig into cross-addictions, perimenopause curveballs, parenting teens and how sharing your story (even when it’s messy) can change lives.
Takeaways:
“Gray area” drinking thrives on qualifiers; clarity reduces stigma and increases connection.
Cravings can resurface years in — play the tape forward and “tell on yourself” to your sober network.
Sharing your story can be a professional risk — and a lifeline for others (and you).
Language and identity (“alcohol-free,” “sober,” “alcoholic”) often depend on social circles; choose what supports your recovery.
Perimenopause symptoms can echo old patterns; stack healthy coping tools early.
Key Timestamps:
[02:01] — Alysse’s Chicago intro + Kelley’s “grew up above a bar” backstory.
[06:00] — Media hustle: pitching herself, ”Today Show” bump and making impact.
[09:08] — Making her mess her message: therapist transparency & the book.
[18:32] — A real-time craving in a hotel — and the group text that saved the day.
[34:23] — Labels, stigma and the “gray area” short film.
[27:26] — Perimenopause, rage, sleep and staying out of old habits.
Resources & Links:
-Kelley Kitley: Website, Instagram, LinkedIn, Facebook
-Book: ”MY self: An autobiography of survival”
-TEDx: ”I show my scars so others know they can heal”
–The Kelley Kitley Podcast: America's Social Worker Unfiltered
-YouTube: ”Gray Area”
–Alcohol + Substance Use Disorder Guide
–Recovery Nonprofit Resource Guide
–LBGTQ+ Recovery Resource Guide
Connect with Us:
-Website: www.thesobercurator.com
-Facebook: @The Sober Curator
-Instagram: @thesobercurator
-X: @thesobercurator
-YouTube: @thesobercurator
-Pinterest: @thesobercurator
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About:
Sobriety isn’t the end of the party—it’s just the start of a better one. Hosted by Alysse Bryson, media powerhouse and sobriety’s ultimate hype woman, and joined by Sober Curator contributors, The Sober Curator Podcast* delivers bold convos, pop culture deep dives, and zero-proof living that doesn’t suck. Whether you're sober, sober-curious, or just looking for good vibes without the hangover, we’ve got you covered. Subscribe now—because getting sober matters, staying sober matters more.
The intro and outro music for this episode is proudly featured with permission from Avatari. All rights reserved to the original creators. For more of their work, check out his website: https://www.avatariworld.com/music.
*The Sober Curator Podcast is a space for open and honest conversations about sobriety, recovery, and alcohol-free living. While we celebrate all paths to a sober lifestyle, some topics discussed may be sensitive or triggering for certain listeners. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. If you’re in recovery or exploring sobriety, please take care while listening and seek support from trusted professionals as needed.
SOBRIETY IN THE CITY – SAN DIEGO: Owning a Successful Bar While Maintaining Sobriety – Cesar Vallin’s Story at Cloak & Petal
Welcome to HAPPY EVERY HOUR, your go-to hub for all things NA (non-alcoholic). We review alcohol-free beers, ciders, wines, spirits, RTDs (ready-to-drink), and share NA cocktail recipes that taste just as good—if not better—than the boozy originals. Whether you’re sober, sober-curious, or just taking a break, this is where great taste meets zero proof.
TRIGGER WARNING: People in early sobriety may want to proceed with caution. Always read labels. Please hydrate responsibly … #becausedrunkneverlooksgood.
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