“Hangovers are canceled; fun is mandatory.” It’s a cheeky promise, but in episode 29 of The Sober Curator Podcast, that line becomes a thesis about what we really chase when we chase more — more money, more status, more thrill. The panel — hosts Alysse Bryson and Tamar Routly, and contributors Sarah Alaimo, Carolyn Bunn Lane Kennedy, Dr. Sarah Michaud and Megan Swan — gathered to unpack Apple TV+’s “Your Friends & Neighbors,” a sleek neighborhood drama where the crimes sparkle as much as the kitchens, and where the pursuit of “enough” looks suspiciously like addiction with better shoes.
From the jump, Alysse frames the discussion with a wink: sobriety here isn’t a limitation; it’s an upgraded operating system. The show choice is perfect because “Your Friends & Neighbors” puts dopamine on display — sometimes via martinis and party nights, but more often via attention, applause and adrenaline. The panel calls it out plainly: “They’re following that next dopamine hit,” Tamar says, connecting the dots between substance use and socially sanctioned compulsions like shopping, sex or endless home upgrades.
Identity Quakes
The series’ central spiral begins where many real-life spirals do: a sudden identity quake. Lose the job, and you might lose the story you’ve told yourself about who you are. Megan articulates the whiplash: “High, high, high, and then the spiral down.” The character’s solution — steal back power in five-figure increments — feels less like villainy and more like compulsion. The fact that no one notices luxury items vanishing becomes its own indictment of excess; a neighborhood so padded by wealth that it can’t feel what’s missing is already half-numb.
Psychologically, Dr. Sarah points to repressed anger and detachment. The show’s couples carry crates of unspoken resentment — rage keyed into car doors and boss’s faces, frustration poured into workaholism, grief translated into risk. It’s textbook self-medication, except the drugs are prestige and power. Meanwhile, Carolyn observes a simpler pattern: every catastrophic turn seems to begin with “drinking or the drugs,” like accelerant flicked onto an already-dry field. In recovery language, we might call it stacking triggers.
Through the DNA Lens
Lane widens the lens to biology through her DNA-centric frame: some of us are wired to need bigger edges and faster relief. In the show, those needs get channeled into audacity — glass cases opened, art lifted, social gambits played like high-stakes hands. In real life, we can redirect that wiring toward rock walls and marathons, or toward creative pursuits that offer flow without court dates. The pattern matters more than the object. Change the object, keep the pattern, and the spiral continues — just dressed differently.
Tamar’s cultural reference — “somewhere between ‘Big Little Lies’ and ‘Succession’” — does more than triangulate tone; it captures how the series turns privilege into pressure. The more the characters acquire, the lonelier they become. Even the show’s sweetest moment — a paper bag of Fireballs (the candy) that means more to an ex-wife than an entire curated party — quietly argues for intimacy over spectacle. A $5 gesture beats a $50,000 soirée because it says, “I know you,” not just, “I can afford you.”
Underneath the gossipable plot points sits a conversation about conversation itself. Dr. Sarah cites the modern erosion of basic dialogue; we’ve grown fluent in posting, rusty in talking. That tracks with the series’ emotional weather: glamorous rooms filled with people who can’t tell the truth about what hurts. Recovery, at its best, is a curriculum in telling that truth — first to ourselves, then to someone safe, and eventually to our communities.
Why Watch?
What does a sober read of “Your Friends & Neighbors” offer to listeners who may never steal a Rolex or key a Tesla? A mirror. Maybe you don’t lift art, but you do reach for something when discomfort spikes — a cart, a screen, a calendar stuffed with “busy.” Maybe your rush is attention. Maybe it’s safety. The show exaggerates to entertain, but the psychology is ordinary: when we feel powerless, we grab for control; when we feel empty, we grab for “more.” The catch is that “more” won’t love you back. People will.
By the end, the panel’s ratings hover in the 4–4.75 range — strong marks justified by tight writing, sleek production and characters who are both infuriating and familiar. More importantly, the episode models what sober pop culture can do: use the fun stuff to talk about the real stuff. Addiction’s modern disguises look respectable until you look closer. And when you do, you find the same old bargain: sacrifice connection, get short-term relief.
The Sober Curator’s closing encouragement is simple: trade consumption for conversation. Call a friend. Invite someone over for popcorn and Hot Tamales (apparently the panel’s official “emotional support snack”). Try a Wild Folk in your glass. Make a night of it, but make it yours. Then ask the question the episode keeps asking: What are you chasing… and what could you choose instead? Listen to the full conversation for laughs, nuance and a reminder that hangovers may be canceled, but honest joy is very much on the menu.
Getting sober is one thing—but staying sober? That’s where the real adventure begins.
This show is for you if you’ve ever wondered:
– Where can I find inspiring sober podcasts, apps, and creators?
– How do I give back or stay plugged into the sober community
– What are the best sober-friendly drinks and travel tips?
– Where do I find the good NA drinks that don’t taste like regret?
The Sober Curator is your go-to for sober pop culture, booze-free travel, apps, creators, and community.
We’re not here to help you get sober.
We’re here to help you live sober—and love it.
In this gripping episode, Alysse sits down with filmmaker Benjamin Flaherty for a powerful conversation about the business behind addiction recovery — and why too many families are left carrying shame, confusion, and financial devastation while trying to save their loved ones. Benjamin’s documentary exposes the economics, ethics, and emotional fallout inside the modern treatment industry, while also honoring the parents, advocates, and survivors who continue fighting for change.
From medically assisted treatment debates to the insurance inequalities that shape who gets quality care, this episode goes deeper than most sober conversations dare to go. It’s raw, urgent, and grounded in truth — the kind of discussion that can only happen in a space built for honesty.
Takeaways:
Families aren’t alone. Many parents attend screenings thinking their child’s exploitation or treatment experience was “their fault” — Benjamin’s film shows the systemic patterns behind the pain.
Recovery has an economic engine. Benjamin describes the shocking moment he realized how profitability shapes care, access, and outcomes in the treatment world.
Insurance determines who gets humane care. Both Benjamin and Alysse reflect on how “good insurance” gave them safe recovery environments — an advantage many don’t have.
Pop culture shapes our understanding. Films like Dopesick, Painkiller, Pain Hustlers, Body Brokers help raise awareness but flatten nuance; documentaries add back the complexity.
Conversations spark courage. When parents meet each other at screenings, shame lifts and the real healing begins.
Key Timestamps:
00:06:40 — Benjamin’s turning point: quitting alcohol & cocaine in high-pressure advertising
00:07:45 — The myth of “the next milestone” that will magically fix everything
00:08:20 — Why treatment is the only major health process most people don’t understand
00:26:26 — Parents finding relief and validation through the film
00:27:00 — The economics of recovery: what families aren’t told
00:28:00 — Alysse shares her own insurance-based experience and privilege in treatment access
00:28:20 — Pop culture portrayals of recovery & exploitation (Body Brokers, Painkiller, Dopesick)
00:41:56 — The media Benjamin loves — and what representations resonate most
Resources & Links:
Website / Film https://www.stoptheshuffle.com/
Instagram: @benjaminflaherty
YouTube Trailer: OFFICIAL TRAILER | SHUFFLE
–Alcohol + Substance Use Disorder Guide
–Recovery Nonprofit Resource Guide
–LBGTQ+ Recovery Resource Guide
Connect with Us:
-Website: www.thesobercurator.com
-Facebook: @The Sober Curator
-Instagram: @thesobercurator
-X: @thesobercurator
-YouTube: @thesobercurator
-Pinterest: @thesobercurator
Send Feedback:
If you have a story, feedback, or just want to connect, email us at thesobercurator@gmail.com. We’d love to hear from you!
About:
Sobriety isn’t the end of the party—it’s just the start of a better one. Hosted by Alysse Bryson, media powerhouse and sobriety’s ultimate hype woman, and joined by Sober Curator contributors, The Sober Curator Podcast* delivers bold convos, pop culture deep dives, and zero-proof living that doesn’t suck. Whether you're sober, sober-curious, or just looking for good vibes without the hangover, we’ve got you covered. Subscribe now—because getting sober matters, staying sober matters more.
*The Sober Curator Podcast is a space for open and honest conversations about sobriety, recovery, and alcohol-free living. While we celebrate all paths to a sober lifestyle, some topics discussed may be sensitive or triggering for certain listeners. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. If you’re in recovery or exploring sobriety, please take care while listening and seek support from trusted professionals as needed.
🔗TSC Podcast on Apple Podcasts
🔗TSC Podcast on Spotify Podcasts – 👀WATCH THE SHOW! 📺
🔗 TSC Podcast on YouTube – 👀WATCH THE SHOW! 📺
SOBER ENTERTAINMENT X SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE: Jon Hamm in “Your Friends & Neighbors” Explains Everything About Your Self-Destructive Patterns
THE MINDFUL BINGE at The Sober Curator is where we binge-watch and chill—mindfully. In this TV series review section, we don’t just consume shows; we explore their stories, themes, and cultural impact through a sober lens. Using our signature Sobees Scoring System, we rate each pick to help you choose your next watch with intention.
Our digital shelves are neatly organized into Drama, Dramedy, and Reality, making it easy to find your perfect series for a night in.
RECOVERY PODCASTLAND & NETWORK at The Sober Curator is your audio haven for all things sobriety and recovery. We’re your bee-zy sober podcast enthusiasts, curating the best shows that educate, inspire, and entertain in the alcohol-free space.
Our archives are neatly organized so you can easily explore Recovery Podcastland—featuring our favorite recovery-based podcasts from across the globe—and the TSC Podcast Network, where we share our own original shows on sober lifestyle, pop culture, travel, entertainment, and more.
Whether you’re seeking practical recovery tips, personal stories, or uplifting inspiration, this is your go-to listening guide.
SOBER POP CULTURE at The Sober Curator is where mainstream trends meet the vibrant world of sobriety. We serve up a mix of movie, podcast, fashion, and book recommendations alongside alcohol-free cocktails, celebrity features, and pop culture buzz—all with a sober twist.
We’re here to shatter the “sobriety is boring” myth with a mash-up of 80s neon, 90s hip-hop edge, early 2000s bling, and today’s hottest trends. From celebrity shoutouts to red-carpet style inspo, this is where sober is as chic as it is fun. To the celebs using their platform for good—our Sober Pop Trucker hats are off to you!
Resources Are Available
If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.
