Sober Spotlight Q&A with Tim Lodgen
What’s your Sobriety Date?
March 5th, 2021
Favorite Non-Alcoholic Beverage of Choice?
Sprite or Water
What’s your favorite #QUITLIT Book?
The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous and Knocking Doors Down: A Story of Breaking Through the Darkness and Finding Redemption by Carlos Vieria. He also has a podcast and it’s great! Click HERE for the podcast link.
What advice do you have for someone new to recovery?
Don’t get frustrated and trust the process. It really is a one-day at a time deal. Don’t think too far ahead or it will overwhelm you. I really struggled with this during treatment. After leaving treatment, by practicing living one day at a time (ODAAT), the future isn’t as overwhelming as it may feel at first.
How does your recovery benefit your career?
I’m a carpenter by trade and I drank alcoholically for 27 years. Obviously, it started to affect my job. I wasn’t getting projects done on time, I was missing work, calling out sick, and making lots of excuses. After getting sober, I reestablished the pride I have in my craft. I’m accountable and my employer has been impressed with my craftsmanship. I have an entirely new attitude toward going to work.
How has recovery impacted your family life?
Recovery has restored love, compassion, patience, and understanding in my home. I thank God that I was never physically abusive, but I know I was verbally abusive. My house is now peaceful and feels balanced. I have three daughters. It took over nine months for one of my daughters to even talk to me. But I didn’t press it and eventually when she was ready, we talked things over. She’s proud of me now. To date, healing this relationship has been one of the biggest moments in my sobriety.
Let’s talk selfie-care. What do you do to take time for yourself?
I love working out. This year, I’ll be competing in my 1st bodybuilding competition. My mother used to compete and my uncle was Mr. Universe and Mr. Maryland. I’ve always worked out, with training in martial arts and boxing. I’ve always been athletic, but I also was always drinking. That always got in the way of having real success as an athlete.
Going public with your recovery can be intimidating. What tips or benefits do you have to share?
Do it, when you’re ready. I barely spoke for the first 32 days in treatment. I was ashamed of my behaviors and I didn’t want anyone to know anything about me. Then I started going to meetings and did 90 meetings in 90 days. The more meetings I went to, the more stories I heard. I learned by sharing my story, I could help someone else in the room who might need to hear what I have to say that day. Sharing our stories is the powerful cement that binds us. I’ve learned we do recover and it is a we program. It’s all been incredibly therapeutic.
If you could go backwards and give your newly sober self some advice, what would it be?
Don’t lose hope. I almost lost hope. My wife found me with a rope around my neck standing on a bucket. I was so lost. I lost faith and I didn’t believe anyone would understand the pain I was going through. This was the scariest and darkest moment in my life. The damage would have been irreversible. As I was waiting for a plane to take me to rehab, I finally experienced hope. The weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders, I can recover.
Is there a nonprofit you support?
I struggle with bipolar disorder. There is a mission in Baltimore, Maryland and I try to go down there every other weekend and just talk to people about taking my medicine. Many of us in recovery struggle to take our medications as prescribed and it’s a unique way I can be of service to others.
SOBER POP Culture Lightning Round!
What is your favorite guilty pleasure?
FOOD! I love hot wings, blue cheese, and celery. Fridays are my cheat days.
Favorite Sober Celeb or Sober Musician?
Brandon Novak – I’ve actually known him since elementary school. He helped get me on the plane and get me into rehab. We talk every other week. He’s doing incredible service work in the recovery community and currently owns three recovery houses. I gifted him one of the tables I make. Brandon has guided me through this process and been so hands on.
What’s on your podcast playlist right now?
Zack Mathers Braving the Journey, Soberoso, and Knocking Doors Down, which I mentioned before.
Favorite music?
Classic rock and metal for working out. I also enjoy country. Zac Brown Band, Christ Stapleton, Beastie Boys, and Wutang.
Favorite Movie or TV Series that has addiction as part of the storyline?
Silver Lining Playbook with Bradley Cooper and Don’t Worry, He’s Not Going to Get Far on Foot
Ok, let’s get spiritual. What’s your practice?
I work hard on staying spiritually fit starting every day praying and thanking God for a second chance. Praying for others, to be less selfish, and I read the daily reflections every day. It’s funny how those daily reflections always hit home on the perfect days. Throughout the day, I try to remember the daily reflection. How I start my morning affects how the day will play out. For me, this is life or death and I was so close to death, so missing a day of practicing prayer and meditation is not an option.
Do you have a favorite place to travel or vacation sober?
We have an upcoming trip to Disney World planned with my four year old grandson.
If you want to follow long with Tim, you can find him on Instagram @tlodgen
SOBER SPOTLIGHT: This section of our site highlights extraordinary people in recovery. Sober small business owners doin’ their thing gives us all the feels. Who is making a difference in your recovery community? If you know someone we should spotlight please connect with us at thesobercurator@gmail.com or DM us on social media.
Resources are available
Resources Are Available
If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.
