Discover how the timeless wisdom of Stoicism can enhance your journey through the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. This monthly series dives deep into each step, exploring practical tools for self-reflection, emotional resilience, and lasting recovery. By integrating Stoic principles like courage, discipline, and acceptance, you’ll gain fresh insights into the transformative power of AA while building a foundation for inner peace and personal growth. Whether you’re new to recovery or seeking to deepen your understanding, these articles offer a roadmap for a stronger, more meaningful sobriety. Don’t miss the opportunity to redefine your recovery journey—step by step, month by month.
Step 1
Welcome to Step 1 of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), where the suffering alcoholic can find freedom in surrender. When someone with alcohol use disorder finally gets sick and tired of being sick and tired, this is the first step to a new life and a promising future. In fact, in the AA Big Book (pages 83-84), the program sets forth a set of promises one can realize if we work the program.
The promises are as follows:
1. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through.
2. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
3. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
4. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.
5. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
6. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
7. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
8. Self-seeking will slip away.
9. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
10. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
11. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
12. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.”
How amazing is that set of promises? It seems unachievable at the beginning of our journey, but I am one of many who can attest that it is achievable. It is often repeated in AA meetings that this program is simple but not always easy. If we are ready to find sobriety, we are simply exchanging challenges that can improve our lives with the current challenges that are destroying our lives.
What does it mean to be powerless over alcohol?
Step 1 reads: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.
The first step in a 12-step program is about acknowledging powerlessness over an addiction and recognizing that life has become unmanageable as a result. It is an admission that one cannot control one’s compulsive behavior or dependency on a substance, and it has negatively impacted various aspects of one’s life.
Getting to the point of being willing to take this step is a different path for nearly everyone. “Hitting Bottom” is typically used to describe one’s readiness; however, many people hit multiple bottoms, and one’s bottoms can vary significantly. I think of hitting bottom as the point at which alcoholics have entirely run out of excuses and rationalizations that we can drink like other people.
We are like tornadoes in our own lives and the lives of others when we are drinking. We may have lost jobs, friends, family, health, and all the other vital things in our lives because of our drinking. These losses and the damage we have done create a powerful visual of powerlessness.
Taking Step 1 – The Act of Surrendering
When we are ready to take Step 1, we move closer to applying Marcus Aurelius’s quote to ourselves: “The wise man accepts his pain, endures it, but does not add to it.” By taking the first step, we stop adding to our pain and start a new way of living.
When we take Step 1, the “One Day at a Time” concept becomes critical. This slogan encourages focusing on the present moment and staying sober one day at a time rather than becoming overwhelmed by the prospect of lifelong abstinence.
By breaking the goal of sobriety into manageable increments, we can better cope with cravings, triggers, and the challenges of maintaining sobriety. It has always been helpful to me to meditate on this quote from Marcus Aurelius, “When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” We add to this by repeating the 1st step and committing to 24 hours of sobriety each morning
Taking Step 1 requires us to confront the reality of our situation, breaking through denial and self-deception. It sets the foundation for the rest of the program, as it opens the door to self-reflection, acceptance, and a willingness to seek support from others who have faced similar struggles. It is a powerful starting point for personal growth and recovery.
How does Stoicism relate to 12-step programs?
There are parallels between the first step of a 12-step program and certain Stoic principles. Both emphasize acceptance of reality and acknowledging things beyond one’s control. Epictetus states, “There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things beyond the power of our will.”
In Stoicism, there’s a concept called the “dichotomy of control,” which encourages individuals to focus only on what they can control and accept what they cannot. The first step, with its acknowledgment of powerlessness over addiction, aligns with this Stoic idea of recognizing and accepting limitations. Admitting powerlessness over alcohol is not something to be ashamed of; it is an act of courage and acceptance of our reality.
Another powerful tool adopted in AA is the recitation of the Serenity Prayer. This prayer is in direct alignment with the concept of dichotomy of control. Repeating the Serenity Prayer during challenging times has been the most valuable tool in my sobriety toolbox.
The Serenity Prayer:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.
In addition to the dichotomy of control, the first step and Stoicism stress the importance of self-awareness and a clear understanding of one’s shortcomings. More need for self-awareness will come in later steps, but for now, the focus is on our awareness of all the evidence in front of us that we have lost control and cannot drink like other people.
While not identical, these philosophical and programmatic approaches share common themes of acceptance, self-awareness, and, in later steps, surrendering control over things beyond one’s power.
Conclusion
The first step and Stoicism offer powerful tools for navigating life’s challenges with greater acceptance and resilience. By acknowledging our limitations and focusing on what we can control, we can find freedom from the grip of addiction and unhealthy behaviors. This recognition paves the way for self-awareness, personal growth, and a more fulfilling life guided by principles of wisdom and virtue.
Just as Marcus Aurelius found strength in Stoic philosophy while ruling an empire, individuals in recovery can draw upon these ancient principles to face their battles with courage and serenity. By embracing the wisdom of acceptance, surrender, and self-reflection, we can embark on a journey of lasting transformation.
Contributor: Tony Harte, Founder of A Stoic Sobriety. Follow along with Tony on IG @a_stoic_sobriety.
SPIRITUAL GANGSTER: Welcome to the ‘Spiritual Gangster’ wing of The Sober Curator, a haven for those on a sober journey with a twist of spiritual sass. Here, we invite you to plunge headfirst into a world of meditation, astrology, intentionality, philosophy, and spiritual reflection – all while firmly keeping your feet (and sobriety) on the ground.
A Disco Ball is Hundreds of Pieces of Broken Glass, Put Together to Make a Magical Ball of Light. You are NOT Broken, Friend. You are a DISCO BALL!
Resources Are Available
If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.
