Close Menu
The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
  • HOME
  • ABOUT
    • ❤️ CONTENT
    • CONTRIBUTOR DIRECTORY
    • DEAR READERS✏️
    • MEET THE SOBER CURATOR
    • 📰 PRESS 📺
    • THE SOBEES 🐝
    • CONTACT 📧
  • HAPPY EVERY HOUR
    • NA BEERS AND CIDERS 🍺
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC WINES 🍾
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC SPIRITS 🍸
    • READY TO DRINK 🥤
    • BEHIND THE BAR 🍋‍🟩
    • NA TASTING EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
  • HEALTH & WELLNESS
    • BREAK FREE
    • CODEPENDENCY
    • MASTERING MENTAL FITNESS 🧠💪🏼
    • MENTAL HEALTH 🧠
    • RELATIONSHIPS 🤟🏽
    • SOBER NOT SUBTLE
    • SOBER POETRY 🖋️
    • SPEAK OUT! SPEAK LOUD! 🗣️
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • WELLNESS AS A WAY OF LIFE
  • LIFESTYLE
    • #ADDTOCART 🛍️
    • ASK MRS. (W)RIGHT ⁉️
    • COMING OUT SOBER 🏳️‍🌈
    • 🏆 CONTENT
    • ✂️CURATED CRAFTS🎨
    • FASHION 👠
    • SHOP 🛒
    • SOBER SPOTLIGHT 🔦
    • SOBER CONTENT CREATION 💻
    • SOBER UNBUZZED FEED
  • ENTERTAINMENT
    • #QUITLIT 📚
    • MOVIE REVIEWS 🍿
    • MUSIC 🎶
    • POPCULTURE
    • RECOVERY PODCASTLAND 🎙️
    • SOBER CURATOR PODCAST 🎧
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER SPORTS
    • TV SHOW REVIEWS 📺
  • TRAVEL & EVENTS
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER RETREATS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBRIETY IN THE CITY
      • SOBER IN MINNEAPOLIS
      • SOBER IN NYC
      • SOBER IN SEATTLE
    • WHAT A TRIP! 🧳
  • SPIRITUAL GANGSTER
    • THE CARD DIVO 🔮
    • CLASSY PROBLEMS
    • SOBERCAST
    • SOBERSCOPES
    • SOBRIETY IN FLOW 🧘🏻‍♀️
    • THIRSTY FOR WONDER
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • STOICISM
  • RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • ALCOHOL & SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER RESOURCE GUIDE
    • BREAK FREE FOUNDATION
    • FAMILY RESOURCES
    • GLOSSARY OF ADDICTION AND RECOVERY TERMS
    • LGBTQ+ RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • RECOVERY STORIES
Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram Pinterest YouTube LinkedIn TikTok
The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
  • HOME
  • ABOUT
    • ❤️ CONTENT
    • CONTRIBUTOR DIRECTORY
    • DEAR READERS✏️
    • MEET THE SOBER CURATOR
    • 📰 PRESS 📺
    • THE SOBEES 🐝
    • CONTACT 📧
  • HAPPY EVERY HOUR
    • NA BEERS AND CIDERS 🍺
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC WINES 🍾
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC SPIRITS 🍸
    • READY TO DRINK 🥤
    • BEHIND THE BAR 🍋‍🟩
    • NA TASTING EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
  • HEALTH & WELLNESS
    • BREAK FREE
    • CODEPENDENCY
    • MASTERING MENTAL FITNESS 🧠💪🏼
    • MENTAL HEALTH 🧠
    • RELATIONSHIPS 🤟🏽
    • SOBER NOT SUBTLE
    • SOBER POETRY 🖋️
    • SPEAK OUT! SPEAK LOUD! 🗣️
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • WELLNESS AS A WAY OF LIFE
  • LIFESTYLE
    • #ADDTOCART 🛍️
    • ASK MRS. (W)RIGHT ⁉️
    • COMING OUT SOBER 🏳️‍🌈
    • 🏆 CONTENT
    • ✂️CURATED CRAFTS🎨
    • FASHION 👠
    • SHOP 🛒
    • SOBER SPOTLIGHT 🔦
    • SOBER CONTENT CREATION 💻
    • SOBER UNBUZZED FEED
  • ENTERTAINMENT
    • #QUITLIT 📚
    • MOVIE REVIEWS 🍿
    • MUSIC 🎶
    • POPCULTURE
    • RECOVERY PODCASTLAND 🎙️
    • SOBER CURATOR PODCAST 🎧
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER SPORTS
    • TV SHOW REVIEWS 📺
  • TRAVEL & EVENTS
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER RETREATS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBRIETY IN THE CITY
      • SOBER IN MINNEAPOLIS
      • SOBER IN NYC
      • SOBER IN SEATTLE
    • WHAT A TRIP! 🧳
  • SPIRITUAL GANGSTER
    • THE CARD DIVO 🔮
    • CLASSY PROBLEMS
    • SOBERCAST
    • SOBERSCOPES
    • SOBRIETY IN FLOW 🧘🏻‍♀️
    • THIRSTY FOR WONDER
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • STOICISM
  • RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • ALCOHOL & SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER RESOURCE GUIDE
    • BREAK FREE FOUNDATION
    • FAMILY RESOURCES
    • GLOSSARY OF ADDICTION AND RECOVERY TERMS
    • LGBTQ+ RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • RECOVERY STORIES
The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
Home - Dementia, Death and Sobriety – Reflections on Grief, Gratitude and Love 
HEALTH & WELLNESS

Dementia, Death and Sobriety – Reflections on Grief, Gratitude and Love 

Stephen KimballBy Stephen KimballAugust 22, 20256 Mins Read
Dementia, Death and Sobriety - Reflections on Grief, Gratitude and Love 
Share
Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Pinterest Email

On the Morning of July 14, 2025, my father called to tell me that my mother had died. My mother died the day after her 85th birthday. In reality, she went to sleep the night of her 85th birthday and went wherever you go when you die. It was also one day shy of a year since she moved into a memory care facility, as her needs had become more than my dad was able to safely manage. 

My mom’s death was the end of a 10-year journey since she’d been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. It is a cruel disease. Alzheimer’s disease is a thief that breaks into your house night after night and day after day and steals pieces of your loved one — leaving less and less of the person you know. And piece by piece, she slipped away. The last time I saw her, she slept through the visits while I sat with her, unsure of what to do. It was deeply painful.  

But this is not what I’ll remember about my mother. I’ll remember who she was and the way she moved through the world. This might seem like a strange juxtaposition, but I am going to compare my mother to Muhammad Ali. And no, she was not a boxer. But she could float like a butterfly on the dance floor. And her older sisters said she could sting like a bee and make them cry with a single look. No one, however, has ever been able to recreate this look — but they sure remember its impact. The reason I bring up Muhammad Ali is the poem he once recited at Harvard University. And the poem is short. Just two words: Me. We. Some say it is the shortest poem ever written. 

Me. We.

Muhammad Ali

“Me We” summarizes how my mother walked through the world. She believed in the power of the individual — the me — to make change and create positive impacts on the world — the we. Her work at Allen Avenue Unitarian Universalist Church in Portland, Maine, where she spent decades as its director of religious education, is a testament to that. She impacted hundreds of kids and their families. She volunteered at the local program that provided free meals to those less fortunate than my family. She would often feed the folks who were unable to feed themselves. This came full circle when, in her final weeks and months, she had to be fed by her caregivers. In short, she walked the talk. 

We didn’t have a lot of rules growing up. In fact, I can really only remember one. And it is more of a philosophy of how to live your life and how to interact with people: “Never go to bed mad.” That’s it. “Never go to bed mad.” It seems so simple on the surface. But it’s deep. And really, “never go to bed mad” is another way of saying I love you, and I am not going to let an argument or a disagreement ever get in the way of that love. 

And while I can’t remember her ever talking about living with gratitude, it is what she demonstrated with her actions every day. What she taught me was to live every day with gratitude. These two ways of looking at life are a gift: Live with gratitude and love without measure. 

My mom was also kind of the ultimate grandmother. Grammy was what her grandkids called her. My two older kids were blessed with many years with her before dementia set in. And they were beautiful years. My two younger kids did not meet my mom until her illness had greatly progressed. But the ultimate grandmother was still there. And that is because she loved children. Her grandchildren brought her immense joy. 

By the time my mom had received her Alzheimer’s diagnosis, I had been sober for five years and had worked hard to make sure I was also emotionally sober and not just abstaining from alcohol. This allowed me to be present and engaged in her final years, and for my children and father after my mom died. I am grateful for this. On my podcast, I regularly talk about my gratitude for my sobriety. I feel this most in the best of times and in the worst of times. Being sober means being present in your feelings and embracing the moments and feeling them deeply. And this allows you to be present for those you love. This is true whether it is a painful and challenging moment or an incredibly joyous one. It allows you to understand that you can feel both grief and gratitude — that they aren’t separate. They are part of the human condition. No question, Alzheimer’s disease is terrible, but as a family, we took it on with love and gratitude. 

Being sober means being present in your feelings and embracing the moments and feeling them deeply.

Picking up my mother’s ashes, which were heavier than I thought they would be, I wrestled with the idea of what happens when you die. Truthfully, I am still exploring this because I don’t have an answer to this question. What I do know is that the law of conservation of energy states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed. It can only be transformed from one form to another. I believe love is the ultimate energy. So my mom’s energy, her love, is now in the universe. Perhaps it’s in the form of another star in the sky. Perhaps it’s a wave in the ocean. I will probably never know. What I do know is that I miss her, but she is also still with me in my heart, memory and gratitude. 


Sober Dad Crew podcast Stephen Kimball

RECOVERY PODCASTLAND NETWORK – SOBER DAD CREW: This is a podcast focused on sobriety, recovery, fatherhood, parenting, music, food, tattoos, & more. Sober Dad Crew is an independent, DIY production created by Stephen Kimball, who writes, records, and produces the podcast.

SoberDadCrew.com 
Instagram @sober_dad_crew 
Threads: @sober_dad_crew 

Facebook: @SoberDadCrew 
LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kimballstephen


MENTAL HEALTH and living in Recovery at The Sober Curator

The Sober Curator’s MENTAL HEALTH + WELLNESS section is your go-to guide for nurturing emotional well-being—especially for those in recovery. Explore resources, expert insights, and personal stories that connect the dots between mental health, sobriety, and self-care. From managing anxiety and depression to building mindfulness and emotional resilience, we provide practical tools and inspiration to help you thrive alcohol-free. By fostering open, stigma-free conversations, we empower our community to make emotional wellness a cornerstone of long-term recovery.

Dedicated columns on this TSC channel:

  • Break Free Foundation – Scholarships & Support for Recovery with Sober Curator Contributor Alexandra Nyman
  • Codependency – Insights & Recovery with Sober Curator Contributor Dr. Sarah Michaud
  • Mastering Mental Fitness with Sober Curator Contributor James Gwinnett
  • Mental Health – Emotional Wellness in Recovery
  • Relationships – Love, Connection & Boundaries in Sobriety
  • Sober Not Subtle with Sober Curator Contributor Jason Mayo
  • Sober Poetry – Recovery in Verse
  • Speak Out! Speak Loud! – Stories & Creative Expression in Recovery
  • Spiritual Substance – Mindfulness, Science & Soul with Senior Sober Curator Contributor Lane Kennedy
  • Wellness As A Way of Life – Sustainable Health for Powerful Women with Senior Sober Curator Contributor Megan Swan
  • You’ve Been Selected – Finding Purpose After Rock Bottom with Sober Curator Contributor Kate Vitela

FAMILY RESOURCE GUIDE: Families play a pivotal role in both the path to and through recovery. Research shows that individuals with strong family support have significantly better outcomes, including higher rates of sustained sobriety and improved mental well-being.

When families commit to learning about addiction, joining support groups, and actively participating in recovery, their involvement becomes transformative—not just supportive. Recovery is a collective journey, and compassionate, informed family engagement can be the foundation for lasting change.

If you or someone you love is in immediate danger, call 911. If you are in crisis and need immediate help, call 988.


The Sober Curator Email newsletter
SOBERSCRIBE NOW!
Resources Are Available

If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.

follow the sober curator on instagram

Follow The Sober Curator on Instagram

death dementia Gratitude resilience sober dad crew stephen kimball
Share. Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn WhatsApp Reddit Tumblr Email
Stephen Kimball
  • Website
  • Facebook
  • Instagram

Stephen Kimball is the founder and host of the Sober Dad Crew Podcast. He’s also a seasoned professional in business development, marketing, PR, and writing. He resides in the Aurora area of Upstate New York. He’s a husband and the father of 4, collects vinyl, DJs on occasion, loves coffee, and adores scarf weather. He’s been sober since February 10, 2010.

Related Posts

How Our Brains Change When We Give Up Booze by Patti Clark

How Our Brains Change When We Give Up Booze

October 24, 2025
Breaking Free from Addiction: How Virtual Programs Can Help

Breaking Free from Addiction: How Virtual Programs Can Help

October 21, 2025
Sober Dad Crew Episode 80: Alysse Bryson – Building a Sober Pop Culture Movement

Sober Dad Crew: Alysse Bryson – Building a Sober Pop Culture Movement

October 21, 2025
Leave A Reply Cancel Reply

Sober City Mobile App
SOBERSCRIBE AND GET ON THE LIST!
7 events found.
  • Week of October 20
  • Previous week
  • Next week
Notice
No events scheduled for October 20, 2025.
Notice
No events scheduled for October 21, 2025.
7:00 pm
BigVision Recovery Horror Film Reading
October 22 @ 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm PDT

BigVision Recovery Horror Film Reading

BigVision 309 Social Club 309 East 49th Street @ 2nd Ave, New York
$15.00
Ongoing
15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025
October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am PDT

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

Hill Country RV Resort and Event Center 17740 Texas 16, Medina
$55.20
7:00 pm
Sober Dating + Comedy | Sober AF Bottle Shop Tacoma, WA
October 23 @ 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm PDT

Sober Dating + Comedy | Sober AF Bottle Shop Tacoma, WA

SOBER AF Bottle Shop Tacoma 5222 S Tacoma Way, Tacoma
$28.52
Ongoing
15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025
October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am PDT

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

Hill Country RV Resort and Event Center 17740 Texas 16, Medina
$55.20
12:00 pm
Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference
October 24 @ 12:00 pm - 9:00 pm PDT

Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference

Bodecker Foundation 2360 NW Quimby St., Portland
Free
3:00 pm
Speed Dating: Sober & In Recovery
October 24 @ 3:30 pm - 7:00 pm PDT

Speed Dating: Sober & In Recovery

Planted Cafe 333 Smith Street, Brooklyn
$40.00
+ 1 More
Ongoing
15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025
October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am PDT

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

Hill Country RV Resort and Event Center 17740 Texas 16, Medina
$55.20
MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures
October 25 @ 5:00 am - November 2 @ 2:00 pm PDT

MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures

Cusco, the Salktanay Trail, and Machu Picchu!
See website
Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat
October 25 @ 9:00 am - November 1 @ 5:00 pm PDT

Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat

$4000 – $5000
5:00 am
Shatterproof Walks to End Addiction Stigma
October 25 @ 5:00 am - 9:00 am PDT

Shatterproof Walks to End Addiction Stigma

Pier 76 Hudson River Park 408 12th Avenue, New York
11:00 am
Happy.Sober.Free: Madison Meet-Up
October 25 @ 11:00 am - 6:30 pm PDT

Happy.Sober.Free: Madison Meet-Up

Goodman Community Center - Iron Works 149 Waubesa Street, Madison
$111.00
Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference
October 25 @ 11:00 am - 9:00 pm PDT

Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference

Bodecker Foundation 2360 NW Quimby St., Portland
Free
+ 6 More
Ongoing
15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025
October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am PDT

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

Hill Country RV Resort and Event Center 17740 Texas 16, Medina
$55.20
MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures
October 25 @ 5:00 am - November 2 @ 2:00 pm PDT

MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures

Cusco, the Salktanay Trail, and Machu Picchu!
See website
Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat
October 25 @ 9:00 am - November 1 @ 5:00 pm PDT

Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat

$4000 – $5000

Week of Events

Mon 20
Tue 21
Wed 22
Thu 23
Fri 24
Sat 25
Sun 26
October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am PDT

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025 Join us for the 15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025! Where all clean and sober motorcycle riders can gather annually in the Tx Hill

$55.20
October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

October 25 @ 5:00 am - November 2 @ 2:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures

MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures

October 25 @ 5:00 am - November 2 @ 2:00 pm PDT

MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures

MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures Our journey blends the culture and cuisine of Cusco with the legendary Salkantay Trail, culminating at the Incan masterpiece of Machu Picchu. Trek through shifting

See website
October 25 @ 9:00 am - November 1 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat

Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat

October 25 @ 9:00 am - November 1 @ 5:00 pm PDT

Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat

Rediscover Peace & Purpose in Antiqua If you’re in recovery—whether newly sober or years into your journey—and ready to reconnect with your purpose, build meaningful connections, and embrace a life

$4000 – $5000
October 23 @ 2:00 pm - October 26 @ 10:00 am <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

15th Annual Texas Serenity Run 2025

October 25 @ 5:00 am - November 2 @ 2:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

MACHU PICCHU | Capsule Adventures

October 25 @ 9:00 am - November 1 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

Antigua 12 Sober Travel Retreat

October 22, 2025 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm
BigVision Recovery Horror Film Reading
October 22 @ 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm PDT

BigVision Recovery Horror Film Reading

BigVision Recovery Horror Film Reading Step into the shadows for a spine-chilling evening at the 309 Social Club. Join us for a live reading of In The Ghost Light, a recovery-themed

$15.00
October 23, 2025 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm
Sober Dating + Comedy | Sober AF Bottle Shop Tacoma, WA
October 23 @ 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm PDT

Sober Dating + Comedy | Sober AF Bottle Shop Tacoma, WA

Sober Dating + Comedy | Sober AF Bottle Shop Tacoma, WA Sober speed dating comedy event, where sober singles can date other singles at a venue not centered around drinking!

$28.52
October 24, 2025 12:00 pm - 9:00 pm
Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference
October 24 @ 12:00 pm - 9:00 pm PDT

Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference

Recovery in Practice - 2 Day Conference Recovery in Practice—a free two-day conference—will take place October 24-25, 2025, in NW Portland, uniting artists, authors, activists and researchers for workshops, panel

Free
October 24, 2025 3:30 pm - 7:00 pm
Speed Dating: Sober & In Recovery
October 24 @ 3:30 pm - 7:00 pm PDT

Speed Dating: Sober & In Recovery

Speed Dating: Sober & In Recovery Find Your Match! - A Dating & Social Series for Everyone! Different Themes every week. Different Vibes. One Community. Speed Dating: Sober / In

$40.00
October 24, 2025 5:00 pm - 8:00 pm
Rocky Horror Picture Show Night at SOBER AF Zero Proof Bottle Shop
October 24 @ 5:00 pm - 8:00 pm PDT

Rocky Horror Picture Show Night at SOBER AF Zero Proof Bottle Shop

Rocky Horror Picture Show Night Time & Location Oct 24, 2025, 5:00 PM Sober AF Zero Proof Bottle Shop, 5222 S Tacoma Way, Tacoma, WA 98409, USA About the event

See website
+ 1 More
October 25, 2025 5:00 am - 9:00 am
Shatterproof Walks to End Addiction Stigma
October 25 @ 5:00 am - 9:00 am PDT

Shatterproof Walks to End Addiction Stigma

Shatterproof Walks to End Addiction Stigma Together, we walk to end addiction stigma and restore hope for those impacted by substance use disorder. Together, we can change attitudes and save

October 25, 2025 11:00 am - 6:30 pm
Happy.Sober.Free: Madison Meet-Up
October 25 @ 11:00 am - 6:30 pm PDT

Happy.Sober.Free: Madison Meet-Up

Happy.Sober.Free: Madison Meet-Up Join us for an epic sober and wellness event where we will gather, connect and have fun! The day will feature yoga, live music & much more!

$111.00
October 25, 2025 11:00 am - 9:00 pm
Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference
October 25 @ 11:00 am - 9:00 pm PDT

Recovery in Practice – 2 Day Conference

Recovery in Practice - 2 Day Conference Recovery in Practice—a free two-day conference—will take place October 24-25, 2025, in NW Portland, uniting artists, authors, activists and researchers for workshops, panel

Free
+ 6 More
View Calendar
Thirty for Wonder by Anne Marie Cribbin
The Sober Curator
Facebook Instagram X (Twitter) TikTok YouTube Pinterest
  • PRIVACY POLICY
  • LINKS DISCLAIMER
  • EDITORIAL GUIDELINES
  • TERMS OF SERVICE
  • REFUND POLICY
  • DON’T SELL MY INFO
  • DATA SUBJECT REQUEST FORM
  • CONTACT US
© 2025 The Sober Curator - Benefits of a Alcohol Free Lifestyle

Type above and press Enter to search. Press Esc to cancel.