Close Menu
The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
  • HOME
  • ABOUT
    • ❤️ CONTENT
    • CONTRIBUTOR DIRECTORY
    • DEAR READERS✏️
    • MEET THE SOBER CURATOR
    • 📰 PRESS 📺
    • THE SOBEES 🐝
    • CONTACT 📧
  • HAPPY EVERY HOUR
    • NA BEERS AND CIDERS 🍺
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC WINES 🍾
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC SPIRITS 🍸
    • READY TO DRINK 🥤
    • BEHIND THE BAR 🍋‍🟩
    • NA TASTING EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
  • HEALTH & WELLNESS
    • BREAK FREE
    • CODEPENDENCY
    • MASTERING MENTAL FITNESS 🧠💪🏼
    • MENTAL HEALTH 🧠
    • RELATIONSHIPS 🤟🏽
    • SOBER NOT SUBTLE
    • SOBER POETRY 🖋️
    • SPEAK OUT! SPEAK LOUD! 🗣️
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • WELLNESS AS A WAY OF LIFE
  • LIFESTYLE
    • #ADDTOCART 🛍️
    • ASK MRS. (W)RIGHT ⁉️
    • COMING OUT SOBER 🏳️‍🌈
    • 🏆 CONTENT
    • ✂️CURATED CRAFTS🎨
    • FASHION 👠
    • SHOP 🛒
    • SOBER SPOTLIGHT 🔦
    • SOBER CONTENT CREATION 💻
    • SOBER UNBUZZED FEED
  • ENTERTAINMENT
    • #QUITLIT 📚
    • MOVIE REVIEWS 🍿
    • MUSIC 🎶
    • POPCULTURE
    • RECOVERY PODCASTLAND 🎙️
    • SOBER CURATOR PODCAST 🎧
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER SPORTS
    • TV SHOW REVIEWS 📺
  • TRAVEL & EVENTS
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER RETREATS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBRIETY IN THE CITY
      • SOBER IN MINNEAPOLIS
      • SOBER IN NYC
      • SOBER IN SEATTLE
    • WHAT A TRIP! 🧳
  • SPIRITUAL GANGSTER
    • THE CARD DIVO 🔮
    • CLASSY PROBLEMS
    • SOBERCAST
    • SOBERSCOPES
    • SOBRIETY IN FLOW 🧘🏻‍♀️
    • THIRSTY FOR WONDER
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • STOICISM
  • RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • ALCOHOL & SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER RESOURCE GUIDE
    • BREAK FREE FOUNDATION
    • FAMILY RESOURCES
    • GLOSSARY OF ADDICTION AND RECOVERY TERMS
    • LGBTQ+ RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • RECOVERY STORIES
Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram Pinterest YouTube LinkedIn TikTok
The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
  • HOME
  • ABOUT
    • ❤️ CONTENT
    • CONTRIBUTOR DIRECTORY
    • DEAR READERS✏️
    • MEET THE SOBER CURATOR
    • 📰 PRESS 📺
    • THE SOBEES 🐝
    • CONTACT 📧
  • HAPPY EVERY HOUR
    • NA BEERS AND CIDERS 🍺
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC WINES 🍾
    • NON-ALCOHOLIC SPIRITS 🍸
    • READY TO DRINK 🥤
    • BEHIND THE BAR 🍋‍🟩
    • NA TASTING EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
  • HEALTH & WELLNESS
    • BREAK FREE
    • CODEPENDENCY
    • MASTERING MENTAL FITNESS 🧠💪🏼
    • MENTAL HEALTH 🧠
    • RELATIONSHIPS 🤟🏽
    • SOBER NOT SUBTLE
    • SOBER POETRY 🖋️
    • SPEAK OUT! SPEAK LOUD! 🗣️
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • WELLNESS AS A WAY OF LIFE
  • LIFESTYLE
    • #ADDTOCART 🛍️
    • ASK MRS. (W)RIGHT ⁉️
    • COMING OUT SOBER 🏳️‍🌈
    • 🏆 CONTENT
    • ✂️CURATED CRAFTS🎨
    • FASHION 👠
    • SHOP 🛒
    • SOBER SPOTLIGHT 🔦
    • SOBER CONTENT CREATION 💻
    • SOBER UNBUZZED FEED
  • ENTERTAINMENT
    • #QUITLIT 📚
    • MOVIE REVIEWS 🍿
    • MUSIC 🎶
    • POPCULTURE
    • RECOVERY PODCASTLAND 🎙️
    • SOBER CURATOR PODCAST 🎧
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER SPORTS
    • TV SHOW REVIEWS 📺
  • TRAVEL & EVENTS
    • SOBER EVENTS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBER RETREATS CALENDAR 🗓️
    • SOBRIETY IN THE CITY
      • SOBER IN MINNEAPOLIS
      • SOBER IN NYC
      • SOBER IN SEATTLE
    • WHAT A TRIP! 🧳
  • SPIRITUAL GANGSTER
    • THE CARD DIVO 🔮
    • CLASSY PROBLEMS
    • SOBERCAST
    • SOBERSCOPES
    • SOBRIETY IN FLOW 🧘🏻‍♀️
    • THIRSTY FOR WONDER
    • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE 🧬
    • STOICISM
  • RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • ALCOHOL & SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER RESOURCE GUIDE
    • BREAK FREE FOUNDATION
    • FAMILY RESOURCES
    • GLOSSARY OF ADDICTION AND RECOVERY TERMS
    • LGBTQ+ RECOVERY RESOURCES
    • RECOVERY STORIES
The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
Home - Classy Problems: Quitting or Stopping
Classy Problems

Classy Problems: Quitting or Stopping

Dan T. RogersBy Dan T. RogersAugust 18, 20256 Mins Read
Classy Problems Quitting or Stopping
Share
Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Pinterest Email

Classy Problems is a daily post of thinking in motion by Dan T. Rogers. Each post stands alone as a thought-provoking piece, yet together, they create a puzzle of ideas. They invite you to see things from a different angle, rethink what you thought you knew, and explore what’s beyond your current understanding.

Classy isn’t just a read: it’s a practice. Read, listen, and join us for Classy Problems Live, a 15-minute, live virtual conversation held Monday through Thursday at 12:15p PT, where we gather to reflect on the Classy Problems post of the day. No need to prep. Just connect, explore, and reflect. 

Classy Problems Black Crown

Quitting or Stopping

I’ve convinced myself I’m being realistic.
Pulling the plug.
Reading the signs.
Moving on.
I called it stopping.
It’s quitting.
I couldn’t see the loop.
Didn’t notice I’d slipped into escape mode.
Tired.
Frustrated.
Tired and frustrated.
Unclear on what “finished” meant.
Leaving a project midstream
because it didn’t feel worth it anymore.
I never defined “worth it” in the first place.
This loop has a signature:
Avoidance in the form of decisiveness.
Uncertainty masked as clarity.
What helps me determine the difference is asking:
Did I meet the requirement to stop?
Or am I bailing because I never defined “done”?
Stopping closes a loop.
Quitting leaves one open.

Classy Problems Black Crown

Systems Don’t Solve Like Problems

When what’s needed is a conversation about the system behind the stuckness.
This loop has a signature:
Persistence without clarity.
Movement without change.
What helps me see it is asking:
What system is this serving?
What belief is this repeating?
Systems don’t solve like problems.
They don’t break.
They reveal what’s already been built.
Every system is perfectly designed
to produce the results it is currently producing.
Whether I like it or not.
Whether I am aware of it or not.

Classy Problems Black Crown

Vision, Intent, Action

I act with conviction.
I’m building. Shipping. Disrupting.
It feels like creativity.
Looks like momentum.
It’s only movement.
Without vision. Without alignment.
I think it’s productive.
It’s reactive.
I didn’t see that my intent had drifted
from my vision.
Distracted in my action.
I didn’t have alignment.
That’s the difference
between rebellion and restoration.
Between graffiti as vandalism and graffiti as art.
Between being disruptive and being disoriented.
Like launching something new
before revisiting what it was supposed to do.
Action outpacing vision.
Intent distorted by urgency.
What helps me find alignment,
slowing down enough to reconnect:
What was the vision?
What’s the intent?
Does this action intersect with both?
Alignment is the intersection of
the imagined, the meant, and the done.

Classy Problems Black Crown

Constructing Done

I’m excited.
I’m committed.
When really,
I’m interested.
Then it gets hard.
Or it gets slow.
Or I can’t sense any progress.
Then I start looking for the exit.
I justify it.
I spiritualize it.
I call it “trusting my gut.”
It’s not trust.
It’s avoidance framed as intuition.
I couldn’t see the loop.
Wasn’t aware I’d never defined what done looked like.
I knew how to start.
I didn’t know how to finish.
This pattern shows up when my energy drifts.
When I slide into effort without intention.
When forward motion feels like wandering.
That’s not burnout.
That’s misalignment.
Like rewriting a post five times.
Maybe this post,
instead of deciding what finished looks like once.
This loop has a signature:
Effort without orientation.
Movement without meaning.
What helps me define good enuf is asking:
What exactly does done look like here?
What’s the clear requirement to stop?
What signal tells me it’s fulfilled?
Starting is easy.
Finishing takes clarity.
Clarity isn’t found. It’s constructed.

Classy Problems Black Crown

Beliefs. Values. Actions.

For the last couple of years,
we’ve been building a living dictionary to define
the language of The Sidekick Way.
Until recently, we hadn’t felt the need
to define culture.
But a pre-panel conversation this week
pushed it to the
‘it’s indicated’ list.
“Is effective culture in 2025 fundamentally
a people strategy,
a performance lever,
or something else altogether?”
The question framed the tension clearly:

  • Culture theater and performative perks aren’t cutting it.
  • Employees are asking for more—development, balance, meaning.
  • Leaders are feeling pulled—toward performance, scale, and exponential growth.
  • These needs can feel like they’re in conflict.

The conversation had me sharpening
what we at Classy Problems and
in The Sidekick Way
believe to be true.
We did what we do:

  • We got opinionated.
  • We put things in sequence.
  • We told the truth.

Even when it meant admitting
we hadn’t defined something essential.
We started with this:
Culture is the emotional lagging indicator
of misaligned design.

It was honest. But incomplete.
It framed culture as a symptom,
not as an expression.
We kept going:
Culture is the signal of how well
a company’s structures, incentives, and defaults
align with its power patterns, goals, and objectives.

Closer. But heavy.
Too diagnostic.
Not quite livable.
Then we landed on:
Culture is the byproduct of a company’s design,
reflecting its beliefs, values, and actions.

It’s how you find out what the system
prioritizes, protects, and rewards.
Whether those truths are
safe to trust or safe to perform.
It’s not what’s written in the handbook.
It’s what gets rewarded in the hallway.
It’s who gets protected when things go sideways.
It’s what you’re allowed to not say out loud.
We don’t believe there’s one ‘right’ culture.
We do believe effective ones are:

  • Transparent
  • Consistent
  • Well-articulated

They give contributors to that system
the information they need to decide how,
or if, they want to engage.
That said, at Classy Problems and in The Sidekick Way,
we prefer cultures designed to make work
more human and more effective.
We believe trust and clarity shouldn’t be rare.
We believe culture doesn’t change by intention.
It changes by design.

Was a little surprised when I was asked to be on the panel.
I think this post explains my response:
Sure. On one condition.
I reserve the right
to learn more
than anyone in attendance.

Classy Problems Black Crown

Signal or Noise

There are times I convince myself
I need more information.
One more input.
One more meeting.
One more loop around the problem.
I call it research.
It’s reassurance.
I can’t see the loop,
From inside it.
I didn’t sense the stall.
I kept gathering.
Kept asking.
Kept tweaking.
I am avoiding decision.
Like forwarding a presentation for “quick feedback”
when what I need is to commit.
This loop has a signature:
Motion instead of commitment.
Activity instead of alignment.
What helps me construct clarity is asking:
Is this signal or noise?
Is this new information or old fear?
Is this aligned input or a delay tactic?
Clarity doesn’t shout.
It whispers.
When I stop chasing certainty,
the clarity signal can catch me.

Classy Problems Black Crown

I Don’t Mean Golf

I was reluctant to watch it.
Everybody seemed to be talking about it.
Another press conference clip.
Another vulnerable moment gone viral.
Someone I trust sent it.
I’m glad they did.
I am not sure what other people saw.
What I saw was impact.
A person who by every visible measure is succeeding,
caught in a moment where none of it felt like enough.
They weren’t melting down.
They weren’t performing.
They were trying to explain something
you only understand if you’ve felt it:
“I worked my whole life for this…
so why does it feel like this?”
I don’t know what he was carrying when he said it.
I know I’ve carried something like it too.
Not on a stage that big.
Not with that level of accomplishment.
On my level, I know what it’s like to wake up
in a life you built, a life that works, and wonder:
Isn’t it supposed to be better than this?
Everything I can measure is better than before.
Way better, but that feeling…not so much.
I can’t hit a golf ball to save my life.
I do know what it’s like to be hit by lightning.
To realize the version of success you were chasing
might have outgrown its meaning.
I know the ache of asking:
Maybe it’s the wrong game.
I don’t mean golf.


Want more from us? OPT IN to our daily email and join our Classy Problems community. It’s where we abandon certainty in the pursuit of clarity, one interaction at a time.

Graffiti Classy Problems NEW

Classy Problems is a daily post of thinking in motion by Dan T. Rogers. Each post stands alone as a thought-provoking piece, yet together, they create a puzzle of ideas. They invite you to see things from a different angle, rethink what you thought you knew, and explore what’s beyond your current understanding.

What is a classy problem? A classy problem is when we’ve been afforded the opportunity to figure out what to do. Time to figure it out. Time to practice. Time to discern. When faced with the time to figure out a classy problem, it is more effective to focus on what NOT to do than trying to figure out what to do. In a word: restraint. JOIN US in exploring the distinction between what to do and what not to do in the pursuit of clarity.

Footer Image


the intentional course with dan t rogers

THE INTENTIONAL COURSE: Explore our upcoming virtual courses held every week and choose the path that resonates most with your journey. Each session provides a supportive space to reflect, learn, and develop alongside a like-minded community.

Through facilitated sessions, participants focus on one concept at a time, allowing for flexible implementation and deeper learning. The Intentional Course fosters a supportive community where participation is key and offers valuable interactions through small group discussion for shared experiences enhancing comprehension and personal development. This course is offered for fun and for free with no strings attached.


Spiritual Gangster at The Sober Curator

SPIRITUAL GANGSTER: at The Sober Curator is a haven for those embracing sobriety with a healthy dose of spiritual sass. This space invites you to dive into meditation, astrology, intentional living, philosophy, and personal reflection—all while keeping your feet (and your sobriety) firmly on the ground. Whether you’re exploring new spiritual practices or deepening an existing one, Spiritual Gangster offers inspiration, insight, and a community that blends mindful living with alcohol-free fun.

Spiritual Gangster Line-up:

Stoicism & Sobriety – Ancient Philosophy for Modern Recovery with Sober Curator Contributors Derek Castleman and Tony Harte

The Card Divo – Quick & Sober Tarot Readings with Sober Curator Contributor Senior Daniel G. Garza

Classy Problems – Clarity, Restraint & Mindful Decision-Making with Senior Sober Curator Contributor Dan T. Rogers

SoberCast with Six – Astrology & Tarot for the Sober Life with Senior Sober Curator Contributor Analisa Six

Sobriety in Flow – Yoga Beyond the Poses with Senior Travel Sober Curator Contributor Teresa Bergen

Thirsty for Wonder – Recovery Coaching & Spiritual Companionship with Sober Curator Contributor Anne Marie Cribben

Spiritual Substance – Mindfulness, Science & Soul with Senior Sober Curator Contributor Lane Kennedy


The Sober Curator Email newsletter
SOBERSCRIBE NOW!
Resources Are Available

If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.

follow the sober curator on x/ twitter

Follow The Sober Curator on X, the artist formerly known as Twitter

classyproblems dan t rogers intentional sidekick the intentional course
Share. Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn WhatsApp Reddit Tumblr Email
Dan T. Rogers
  • Website
  • LinkedIn

Meet Dan T. Rogers, visionary leader of WORKP2P, Point to Point Transportation, BEATS WORKING podcast, Classy Problems, and The Intentional Course. This former burrito roller turned CEO has dedicated his life to creating systems to help people figure out what they want and how to get it.

Related Posts

Classy Problems: I Missed the Moment

Classy Problems: I Missed the Moment

November 17, 2025
Better Than B4

Classy Problems: Better Than B4

November 10, 2025
Classy Problems: Confessions of a Recovering Control Freak

Classy Problems: Confessions of a Recovering Control Freak

November 3, 2025
Leave A Reply Cancel Reply

Classy Problems – A Daily Signal
Sober City Mobile App
SOBERSCRIBE AND GET ON THE LIST!
7 events found.
  • Week of November 17
  • Previous week
  • Next week
3:00 pm
Self-Promo Without the Cringe: Platform, Pitching, and Press Releases 4-Week Zoom Intensive with Tawny Lara, Starts Monday, November 3rd, 2025
November 17 @ 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm PST

Self-Promo Without the Cringe: Platform, Pitching, and Press Releases 4-Week Zoom Intensive with Tawny Lara, Starts Monday, November 3rd, 2025

Tawny Lara Virtual Course
$299.00
5:00 pm
Mindful Mocktails
November 18 @ 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm PST

Mindful Mocktails

Books on the Bosque 6261 Riverside Plaza Lane #Suite A-2, Albuquerque
$36.43
5:00 pm
Sober One Six: November Sober Social – Marble & Rye
November 19 @ 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm PST

Sober One Six: November Sober Social – Marble & Rye

7:00 pm
Recovery Community Hockey
November 19 @ 7:10 pm - 8:30 pm PST

Recovery Community Hockey

Charles M. Schulz-Highland Arena 800 Snelling Ave S, St. Paul
Notice
No events scheduled for November 20, 2025.
Ongoing
Sobertopia City Retreat
November 21 @ 3:00 pm - November 23 @ 5:00 pm PST

Sobertopia City Retreat

Chateau Tivoli San Francisco
See website
Ongoing
Sobertopia City Retreat
November 21 @ 3:00 pm - November 23 @ 5:00 pm PST

Sobertopia City Retreat

Chateau Tivoli San Francisco
See website
2:00 pm
Presentation & Signing: Non-Alcoholic Drinks For Dummies by Ryan Foley
November 22 @ 2:00 pm - 4:00 pm PST

Presentation & Signing: Non-Alcoholic Drinks For Dummies by Ryan Foley

Asbury Book Cooperative 644A Cookman Avenue, Asbury Park
See website
Umbrella Dry Bar: Make it, Mix it, Master it: A Two-Part Non-Alcoholic Experience
November 22 @ 2:00 pm - 5:00 pm PST

Umbrella Dry Bar: Make it, Mix it, Master it: A Two-Part Non-Alcoholic Experience

Umbrella Dry bar
See website
Ongoing
Sobertopia City Retreat
November 21 @ 3:00 pm - November 23 @ 5:00 pm PST

Sobertopia City Retreat

Chateau Tivoli San Francisco
See website

Week of Events

Mon 17
Tue 18
Wed 19
Thu 20
Fri 21
Sat 22
Sun 23
November 21 @ 3:00 pm - November 23 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PST </span>

Sobertopia City Retreat

Sobertopia City Retreat

November 21 @ 3:00 pm - November 23 @ 5:00 pm PST

Sobertopia City Retreat

Sobertopia City Retreat This retreat is women-only, and focuses on getting to know each other, connecting with each other about our (not!) drinking, and have fun while doing this! There

See website
November 21 @ 3:00 pm - November 23 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PST </span>

Sobertopia City Retreat

November 21 @ 3:00 pm - November 23 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PST </span>

Sobertopia City Retreat

November 17, 2025 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm
Self-Promo Without the Cringe: Platform, Pitching, and Press Releases 4-Week Zoom Intensive with Tawny Lara, Starts Monday, November 3rd, 2025
November 17 @ 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm PST

Self-Promo Without the Cringe: Platform, Pitching, and Press Releases 4-Week Zoom Intensive with Tawny Lara, Starts Monday, November 3rd, 2025

Self-Promo Without the Cringe: Platform, Pitching, and Press Releases 4-Week Zoom Intensive with Tawny Lara, Starts Monday, November 3rd, 2025 Class Starts on Monday, November 3rd, 2025 The class will

$299.00
November 18, 2025 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm
Mindful Mocktails
November 18 @ 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm PST

Mindful Mocktails

Mindful Mocktails Join us at Books on the Bosque for three special nights celebrating sober joy, community, and our love of reading!

$36.43
November 19, 2025 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm
Sober One Six: November Sober Social – Marble & Rye
November 19 @ 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm PST

Sober One Six: November Sober Social – Marble & Rye

Sober One Six: November Sober Social - Marble & Rye Come mingle! If you are sober, sober-curious, Cali-sober, or just supportive of the sober community, ALL are welcome (as always)!

November 19, 2025 7:10 pm - 8:30 pm
Recovery Community Hockey
November 19 @ 7:10 pm - 8:30 pm PST

Recovery Community Hockey

Recovery Community Hockey November 19th ♦ 9-10:30 PM Come out for hockey & fellowship at the Charles M. Schulz-Highland Ice Arena Recovery Community Hockey serves as more than a game-

November 22, 2025 2:00 pm - 4:00 pm
Presentation & Signing: Non-Alcoholic Drinks For Dummies by Ryan Foley
November 22 @ 2:00 pm - 4:00 pm PST

Presentation & Signing: Non-Alcoholic Drinks For Dummies by Ryan Foley

Presentation & Signing: Non-Alcoholic Drinks For Dummies by Ryan Foley Join us for delicious non-alcoholic cocktails and a book event! Non-Alcoholic Drinks For Dummies by Ryan Foley. We are so

See website
November 22, 2025 2:00 pm - 5:00 pm
Umbrella Dry Bar: Make it, Mix it, Master it: A Two-Part Non-Alcoholic Experience
November 22 @ 2:00 pm - 5:00 pm PST

Umbrella Dry Bar: Make it, Mix it, Master it: A Two-Part Non-Alcoholic Experience

Umbrella Dry Bar: Make it, Mix it, Master it: A Two-Part Non-Alcoholic Experience Overview An immersive evening of mindful drinking with Umbrella Dry Bar at Nora Café’s private Library space

See website
View Calendar
classy problems
The Sober Curator
Facebook Instagram X (Twitter) TikTok YouTube Pinterest
  • PRIVACY POLICY
  • LINKS DISCLAIMER
  • EDITORIAL GUIDELINES
  • TERMS OF SERVICE
  • REFUND POLICY
  • DON’T SELL MY INFO
  • DATA SUBJECT REQUEST FORM
  • CONTACT US
© 2025 The Sober Curator - Benefits of a Alcohol Free Lifestyle

Type above and press Enter to search. Press Esc to cancel.