“Those who are the hardest to love, need it the most.” – Julie Piatt
First off, I’m a sucker for a feel-good Netflix series, especially when the world seems just “too much”. Be it too much stress, too much work, or too much news.
As a “keepin’ it” real kinda Wellness Coach, I think the odd Netflix binge is totally fine as long as you are consciously doing it and it isn’t interfering with the rest of your wellness practices – i.e. you are still sleeping well, exercising and eating your veggies. Like anything really, in moderation, it is all good for most to partake.
I personally opt more for feel-good shows like Queer Eye (heartwarming + funny!) and Home Edit (a bit of luxury living porn with a dash of clearing the clutter zen). Who doesn’t love a good makeover bite? Soooooooooo satisfying.
Once in a while, a good love story series comes along that really pulls me in. I’m a sucker for young love, and the more I think about it, the more it makes sense as a part of my life I often wish I could do over without alcohol at the forefront. I was lucky; my sacred firsts, like my first kiss and losing my virginity, were done fully sober – but from there on out, there were so many decisions made in a blur of alcohol that my memories are sparse. That “liquid courage” often had me acting only with an immediate gratification lens and missing all the deeper, quieter, delayed gratification opportunities.
Some of my favorites are The Royals (a deep modern coming of age, Romeo & Juliet twist), Heartstopper (a smart, high school love story between two boys based on an epic manga series) and Emily Does Paris (I know, I know, she couldn’t afford that flat or those clothes with her job…but it is so fun!). To me, it is about escape, and these days, I am conscious that I want to escape somewhere good, not somewhere crime-ridden or apocalyptic.
Netflix “One Day” Trailer
Netflix’s ‘One Day’ Review
This weekend, I watched One Day. Each of the 14 episodes is a moment in time in the relationship of two people, Dexter and Emma. They meet at their university graduation dance, hearts collide, and they are forever woven together but rarely in the right phase at the right time to get together.
Alcohol is ever-present throughout. It kind of sneaks up on you that this is a tale of alcoholism, of using and lost opportunities.
Several themes I found really relatable, such as that one friend you had who might have become more than a friend if the stars aligned differently. Another was the notion of how normalized it is that alcohol and drug use are a part of your twenties. For most, it seems like just a flash point, maybe just a few heavy partying summers or years. For others, such as Dexter and myself, those years can turn into decades.
In the midst of it, you are so in it you can’t see another way. Your self-awareness is extremely low, and you strategically surround yourself with party people to feel even more normal. By now you have consistent bad behavior, mishaps, missed opportunities and deep-rooted shame you desire to numb.
Another thing that struck me with this series, without giving anything away, is the way we tend to come back to old ways to self-medicate if we don’t find a new purpose or habit. We need to find a new community to validate that we are ok, that we are worth forgiving and that life is all about 2nd, 3rd, and 4th chances. It is never too late to start over.
This delightful little series also touches on classism in an important way. Being a “fancy drunk” is no more fancy. Drunk never looks good – even when you pick up the tab or get semi-famous.
Finally, it was so deeply sad to see how disconnected those around him were in the darkest moments because that is often how we are. As Dexter spirals, we not only see how lonely alcoholism really is, but how much lonelier it becomes when everyone avoids pities and focuses on ‘cleaning you up’ instead of holding you tight. Sometimes, out of self-preservation, frustration, or broken promises, we are not always great at reaching out and offering a hug when that is really what is needed. I know I remember; it is rarely simple, but I do think we need to humanize the messiness and see through the bad behavior if we can.
When we are willing to truly witness, be present, and hold someone in their pain without judgment, it is one of the most powerful things we can do for our loved ones and for humanity.
So, here’s to healing the planet one human at a time and enjoying the odd Netflix binge to remember how far we have come. Not that it is about comparing our journey to another, but when we allow ourselves to revisit our past with a lighter, more present heart, we can start to feel the full spectrum of human emotions and recognize how good it is to be fully sober and alive for it all.
One Day Bloopers Reel!
SOBER ENTERTAINMENT: The 35+ Best TV Shows Featuring Addiction + Recovery (thesobercurator.com)
THE MINDFUL BINGE: It’s ok to indulge in a good TV series binge occasionally, as long as you do so mindfully. This section of the site explores TV series that feature addiction, recovery, and mental illness as one of the main storylines.
Are movies more your thing? We get it. Sometimes, you need to escape for 2 hours without the commitment of an entire TV series. MOVIE NIGHT WITH THE SOBER CURATOR has your back!
If you need ideas on what to sip on while you get in that screen time, check out our HAPPY EVERY HOUR section for a complete curated list of non-alcoholic beverage options.
Resources Are Available
If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.
Resources Are Available
If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.
