The Movies Taught Us How to Drink. A Notre Dame Professor Has the Receipts.

There is a professor at Notre Dame who has spent six years asking his students the same question. Why do you drink like that? Six years of asking, and he found out the answer was never inside the bar. It was on the television, playing in the background of every single show we half watched growing up, teaching us the rules before we even knew we were enrolled in the class.

That professor is Ted Mandell, and he sat down with me and Tamar for a Backstage Media Night that turned into one of the most quietly enraging, deeply validating conversations we have had all season. We brought two of our contributors, Sarah Alaimo and Anne Marie Cribbin, into the room to react in real time, and honestly, their reactions are half the reason this episode is going to wreck you a little.

The Blockbuster Confession

We started, as any self-respecting Gen X panel does, by fighting over who remembers what a Solo cup was for and who still has muscle memory for be kind, rewind. Sarah remembers renting DVDs on top of a hill. Anne Marie remembers three movies at a time and Betamax before that. Tamar remembers twenty-nine cent Canadian gas and ten channels. I remember sixty-nine cents a gallon and a television with exactly thirteen options, none of which were mine to choose on family night.

It is a fun bit. It is also a setup, because every single one of us can name the first movie where alcohol showed up in the storyline before we could legally order it ourselves. Tamar says Dazed and Confused. Anne Marie says Sixteen Candles, specifically the scene under the coffee table. I have my own answer and it involves Denzel Washington and a hotel minibar, and it still gets me.

The Part That Made Me Angry

Here is where it stopped being nostalgic and started being personal. Ted has built an entire class around one idea. Culture did not just happen to us. It was built for us, frame by frame, decision by decision, by directors and producers who chose exactly what we would see and exactly what we would not.

He breaks down a very specific teen movie moment where a girl who has never had a drink is turned into a raging party girl in about fifteen seconds of screen time, set to a very specific eighties song that Anne Marie describes having an actual physical reaction to when he played it. I am not going to tell you which song. You need to hear her explain the nostalgia hit for yourself, because it is one of the most honest moments in the episode.

There is also a trope Ted names that had every single one of us go quiet for a second. He calls her the sober female outsider, the good girl who only gets to belong once someone hands her a drink. Once you hear how he lays it out, you cannot unsee it in literally any teen movie you have ever watched.

The Brown Paper Bag Test

This is the clip that made me say out loud, on tape, what. Ted has this comparison he uses with his students involving a trendy green canned cocktail and a brown paper bag with a bottle inside it. Same alcohol. Same amount. Wildly different judgment. I will let you sit with that the way I had to sit with it, because once he says the actual number of drinks most people would consider a totally normal night out, you will understand why Tamar and I both went quiet.

Then there is the statistic that started this whole conversation. A number about how many full time college students already meet the clinical criteria for alcohol use disorder, and why that number does nothing to change behavior until it becomes a story instead of a stat. Ted has 178 of those stories waiting at the end of every semester. He read us pieces of what students write him, and half of them, in his words, would make you cry.

Why This One Stays With You

Sarah, Anne Marie, Tamar and I get into everything from Whole Foods putting wine next to the chicken thighs, to what a Borg actually is, to why Ted admits, on tape, that revenge might have been part of what started all of this for him. We talk about the show Off Campus and whether Hollywood is finally getting closer to telling this story right, or whether it still finds a way to make alcohol the healing part of the plot. I have thoughts. Anne Marie’s heart sinks in real time and you can hear it happen.

This is exactly why Backstage exists. If you want to be part of conversations like this one while they are actually happening, not just hear the highlights after the fact, that is the whole point of joining us. Think of it like a master class, but make it interactive, and it just so happens that everyone in the room is already sober. Founding members get in for nineteen dollars a month, or one hundred ninety-nine dollars for the year if you want to commit and skip the math. Ted sat with us for forty-five minutes and none of us have looked at a rom-com the same way since. That is a fairly normal Tuesday in Backstage.

Press play on the full episode wherever you listen, because there are at least three more moments in this one I have not told you about, including the exact line that made me want this course taught in every high school in America. You are allowed to be angry about what you were taught. You are also allowed to use that anger to build something better. That is exactly what we did with this episode.

Getting sober matters. Staying sober matters more.

The Sober Curator Podcast is available across all major platforms

👉Watch the show on YouTube

👉Watch or listen to the show on Spotify

👉Listen to the show on Apple Podcasts

👉Listen to the show on Amazon

👉Listen to the show on iHeart

---

SOBER CURATOR PODCAST: This Is What It’s Like to Be a Sober Curator

---

Recovery isn’t the end of the story.

Recovery has been framed as survival. Staying sober as maintenance.

We’re interested in something else.
Not just getting through life — but actually engaging with it.

Identity.
Culture.
Celebration.
Taste.
Expansion.

This is the room where the conversation finally aligns with who you’ve become — and where you’re going next. LEARN MORE AND JOIN TODAY →

---

SOBER POP CULTURE at The Sober Curator is where mainstream trends meet the vibrant world of sobriety. We serve up a mix of movie, podcast, fashion, and book recommendations alongside alcohol-free cocktails, celebrity features, and pop culture buzz—all with a sober twist.

We’re here to shatter the “sobriety is boring” myth with a mash-up of 80s neon, 90s hip-hop edge, early 2000s bling, and today’s hottest trends. From celebrity shoutouts to red-carpet style inspo, this is where sober is as chic as it is fun. To the celebs using their platform for good—our Sober Pop Trucker hats are off to you!

Resources Are Available

If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.

Follow The Sober Curator on Instagram