Here is a recap of the 10 Tips and Tricks to Navigate attending Weddings, Birthday Parties, Miscellaneous Celebrations, and Family Gatherings in early recovery. Practicing these suggestions can help you be the best version of your sober-self, as discussed in the SOBER POP Tips Room on the Clubhouse App on Tuesday, June 29th, 2021. For many people in recovery, especially early recovery, the idea of taking good care of yourself and preparing to attend any event can seem overwhelming and even a completely foreign concept.
SOBER POP Tips: 11 Tips and Tricks to Navigate Weddings, Birthday Parties, Miscellaneous Celebrations, and Family Gatherings
1.) Sober Buddies! When its time to party but we don’t want to risk our sobriety, there is strength in numbers. A little accountability goes a long way! Find a sober partner in crime to attend the event with you that you can depend on.
2.) Have an exit strategy! Leave Early! In early recovery you may not be ready for the late night shenanigans and the later it gets the more likely someone maybe drunk and triggering near you. Always having an exit strategy means you won’t find yourself in situations you don’t want to be in. You can always use a common excuse like “I need to get home to my pets.” or “I have to get up early in the morning.”
3.) Transportation is key. As a compliment to your exit strategy, it’s best to not be reliant on someone else for your exit. Use your own mode of transportation whenever possible and have a back-up plan for public transportation or Uber/Lyft.
4.) BYOB! Even thought it’s 2021, many hosts planning parties don’t always consider offering non-alcoholic options. While this trend is slowly changing, why risk it? Either bring some of your favorite alcohol-free beverages and sparkling waters. You could also ask the host of the event in advance what the options will be. People ask for dietary options all the time (gluten free, sugar free, vegan, etc.). You shouldn’t feel uncomfortable vocalizing your health needs as it relates to food OR beverages.
5.) At a Wedding? Hang out with the pregnant women, seniors, or the kids table. That’s where the real fun is at anyway. Instead of focusing on what you are getting out of the event, spend more time being thoughtful about what you can bring to it. (Besides, this group always knows where the leftover cake is at!)
6.) Be a Good Guest! To continue down the line of thinking of what you bring to the table, simply try and be helpful. Do you enjoy taking photos? Spend time taking candid shots of other guests, decorations, and the scenery. Ask the host if you can help by picking up trash, managing recycling, setting something up or taking something down.
7.) Tricks are for kids! Seriously. They love them. Maybe learn a magic trick or have a few dad jokes you can lean on for entertainment purposes.
8.) Keep a drink in your hand. No one is going to offer you a drink if you already have one in your hand. Tell people you are really focusing on hitting your gallon of water a day goal or that you’re the designated driver. Pay attention when you set your drink down, so as not to pick up the wrong drink by mistake.
9.) Keep calm under pressure. Hopefully you don’t have to encounter someone that is pressuring you to imbibe despite the fact you’ve made your boundaries clear. But, it happens. Just remember, when someone else focuses on you not drinking it says more about them than it says about you. Maybe the bride or groom is asking you to drink on their special day? Flip the switch and put it back on them. Tell them you are really focusing on their special day and it will be best for everyone if you stick with the bubbly water. Insert humor when you can. “Oh, no thank you. I really want this to be your special day and me blacking out and peeing on the dance floor just isn’t a good look, right?”
10.) Treat yourself! Maybe you have an extra slice of cake or maybe you indulge in a cigar or cigarillo so you feel like you’re participating in the celebration and not stuck on the sidelines. Also, pack gum and mints to curb any hand to mouth cravings.
11.) Don’t go to the party. We know. That doesn’t sound like any fun. But starting over in recovery isn’t fun either. Remember why you started this journey. Some days we may find that we just aren’t in the right shape physically, mentally, or spiritually to attend an event. Not going is sometimes the best option.
Check Out Previous SOBER POP Tips Topics:
- Service Work – Because Doing Good Feels Good
- Curated List of 10 Best Practices to be Your Best Sober Self!
- 10 Tips on Navigating Shopping Situations in Early Sobriety and 6 Tips on Dealing With Shopping Addiction
- Navigating Live Concerts and Festivals
- Finding a Therapist That’s Right For You – Part One
- Dating Sober
- Traveling Sober
Resources are available
Resources Are Available
If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.