The New York Times Bestseller “Drinking, A Love Story“ by Caroline Knapp, depicting her 20-year battle with booze, should be in your #QUITLIT library. I recently dusted this book off and pulled it down from the shelves of my recovery library. I’m so glad that I did, as this memoir is truly a classic in my eyes. Caroline’s story changed my life in early sobriety. After re-reading it in 2021, this book still holds as much depth and weight as it did the first time I read it.
This memoir was first published in 1996, the same year I gave birth to my son Jakob at 21. One decade later, in 2006, when I finally decided to get sober, this was the first recovery memoir I purchased at Barnes and Noble. I can still picture myself sitting on the floor of the self-help section of the store in Lynnwood, WA, pouring over the first few pages. It was my experience, nearly 15 years ago, that the self-help/addiction section of any bookstore was limited at best. Myspace and Facebook were in their infancy, and I don’t know if sober bloggers existed. If they did, they weren’t on my newly sober radar.
To my surprise and delight, I highlighted and took notes in this book—something I would have never remembered until recently making the choice to re-read it. I surely read and re-read this book multiple times during that first year of sobriety. As I mourned my divorce with vodka and cocaine, Caroline’s words seeped into my soul.
The power of the identification process
When one alcoholic connects with another alcoholic on a personal level, something magical happens. Her story was my story. Her words were my feelings. As I devoured each page, I felt less alone and armed with a renewed sense of self. Reading over my notes and underlines, I realize that Caroline’s story still rings true even today.
Drinking, drinking. Drinking and loving men, drinking and loving men who drink. I never once went out with a man who didn’t get drunk. Never. Right from the start the idea of going out with a man who didn’t like to tie one on was unthinkable to me, and would be for many years.
Drinking, A Love Story by Caroline Knapp
Page 86 changed me
My entire adult life has been challenged when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex. Re-reading her story on page 86 through the end of that chapter (Chapter 6), I noticed it was all highlighted and covered in tear stains. Caroline Knapp had such a powerful way of talking about how her addiction was also intertwined with her failed romantic relationships. If this resonates with you and you haven’t read the book, it will be time well spent. Go add to the cart, I’ll be right here when you return.
All the feels
Alcohol is alluring, but the devastating hold it can have on some people’s lives is sometimes just too much. This book breaks open the secrets around addiction, the family myths, and destructive relationships that go hand in hand for those who suffer from alcohol use disorder. Like a love story, Caroline had very passionate feelings for booze as her one true love. (Oh, how I can relate) A love that would eventually betray her, break her heart, and leave her feeling obliterated.
Publicly, she made it look like she had it all as a dutiful daughter with a stunning professional career in media. I thought my story was similar on paper when, in reality, it was just a well-crafted game of smoke and mirrors. I played the PTA Mom role and the blackout dive bar role. As time marched on, it became harder and harder to keep those two worlds separate.
Caroline Knapp had a way with words, and if you or someone you know has been afflicted by alcoholism, as I have, then this is a must-read #Quitlit classic. It is surely a story that will stand the test of time. With under 300 pages, this book is small but mighty. Caroline Knapp passed away in 2002 from lung cancer.
Feel like you can’t squeeze time to read into your day-to-day life? I have found that Audible books and podcasts allow me to multitask by listening while doing everyday household chores simultaneously, like laundry, running errands, and walking the dogs. Drinking, A Love Story by Caroline Knapp is available on Audible, and you can find it here.
The Sobees #QUITLIT Score: 4 out of 5
Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.
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