There’s a moment in this conversation when filmmaker Benjamin Flaherty describes parents walking out of his documentary screenings with tears in their eyes — not because the film retraumatized them, but because, for the first time, they realized what happened to their family wasn’t their fault.
That moment says everything about why this episode matters.
Benjamin’s work sits at the intersection of storytelling and systemic exposure. He’s not just making a film; he’s building a mirror large enough for families, loved ones, policymakers, and the entire recovery ecosystem to look into. And people are seeing truth — painful, freeing, clarifying truth.
The Recovery Industry No One Wants to Talk About
Addiction is already layered with silence, shame, grief, and generational pain. But when you add the business of recovery on top of it — insurance disparities, treatment mills, exploitation, and the heartbreaking economics of who gets help and who doesn’t — you get a system that is both saving lives and harming them.
Benjamin never planned to become the person shining a spotlight on those contradictions. He came from the world of commercial advertising, chasing achievement like it was oxygen. Sobriety stripped away the illusions he’d built around himself — that his next career milestone, next salary bump, next “win” would finally create the peace he’d been buying with alcohol and cocaine.
Recovery didn’t just change his life.
It clarified his purpose.
When he stepped into documentary filmmaking, he didn’t expect to find an entire industry full of families who’d been shamed into silence — parents who believed their child’s trauma or exploitation was somehow a personal failure.
His film dismantles that belief one story at a time.
At screenings, parents tell him:
“I thought this only happened to us.”
“I thought I should have known better.”
“I thought I caused this.”
And then they meet other parents.
They compare stories.
They see the patterns.
Suddenly, shame loosens its grip.
Where Economics and Compassion Collide
Benjamin explains that addiction treatment is one of the only major health processes where families know almost nothing about the system until they’re thrown into it. Heart surgery, cancer treatment, psychiatric care — these all have established pathways and clear evidence-based standards.
Recovery?
It’s a maze.
Who you call first determines everything.
What insurance you have determines everything else.
Some treatment centers are excellent, ethical, clinically sound. Others operate like for-profit trafficking pipelines, shuttling people between facilities to maximize billing cycles. The average family has no way to distinguish between the two — especially in crisis.
This is where Benjamin’s advocacy hits hardest:
He is not vilifying treatment.
He is exposing the lack of transparency that keeps families vulnerable.
And he’s doing it in a way that humanizes everyone involved — the parents, the patients, the clinicians, and even the people whose jobs sit inside morally gray zones. His goal isn’t to sensationalize the system.
His goal is to illuminate it.
The Privilege Problem No One Wants to Admit
Alysse shares in the episode that she received excellent treatment — safe, structured, well-resourced — because she had “good insurance.” She names it plainly: it was privilege.
Not everyone gets a chance at recovery in an environment designed for healing.
Not everyone receives clinically sound care.
Not everyone gets dignity.
Many families spend their life savings. Others take out loans, empty retirement accounts, or mortgage their homes — and still end up with low-quality or predatory treatment. Some people cycle in and out of detoxes or rapid rehabs with no continuity of care at all.
Benjamin’s film shines a light on this two-tiered system in a way that feels both compassionate and confrontational. He forces viewers to ask:
Why does someone’s insurance policy determine whether they live?
Why should financial literacy dictate access to evidence-based care?
Why aren’t families given real information before choosing treatment?
These aren’t just logistical questions.
They’re ethical ones.
Pop Culture Has Entered the Chat — But Not Without Flaws
We’re living in a moment where Hollywood is suddenly fascinated with addiction narratives:
Dopesick. Painkiller. Pain Hustlers. Body Brokers.
Benjamin acknowledges the influence these stories have, but he’s also honest: scripted portrayals tend to flatten characters into archetypes — the villain doctor, the innocent victim, the greedy broker, the corrupt corporation.
His work aims to put the complexity back where it belongs.
Recovery isn’t one story.
It’s millions of stories shaped by impossible decisions.
His documentary refuses to pick a single villain or a single hero.
Instead, it asks the viewer to look at the whole ecosystem — an ecosystem built on both hope and heartbreak.
Why This Conversation Matters More Than Ever
Every sober person knows this truth:
Sobriety is not just a personal journey.
It exists inside a cultural, economic, and political context.
Benjamin’s film — and this episode — remind us that advocacy is part of recovery. Not everyone will become a filmmaker or policy warrior, but every story strengthens the collective push toward transparency, ethical care, and dignity for all.
One of the most powerful threads in the episode is the theme of relief.
Relief when families finally understand the system.
Relief when they meet each other.
Relief when someone says, “This isn’t your fault.”
Shame thrives in secrecy.
Benjamin’s film — and conversations like this — rip the secrecy wide open.
A New Kind of Recovery Story
Benjamin isn’t trying to fix the treatment industry in one film.
He’s trying to start the right conversation in the right room — with parents, survivors, clinicians, lawmakers, and anyone who has ever loved someone in addiction.
And that’s what The Sober Curator does best:
We hold space for truth.
We laugh where we can.
Advocates where we must.
Builds community where shame once lived.
His work is a reminder that sobriety isn’t just about personal transformation — it’s about cultural transformation.
And the more we understand the system, the less power it has to harm the people we love.
The Sobees Documentary Score: 5 out of 5
Getting sober is one thing—but staying sober? That’s where the real adventure begins.
This show is for you if you’ve ever wondered:
– Where can I find inspiring sober podcasts, apps, and creators?
– How do I give back or stay plugged into the sober community
– What are the best sober-friendly drinks and travel tips?
– Where do I find the good NA drinks that don’t taste like regret?
The Sober Curator is your go-to for sober pop culture, booze-free travel, apps, creators, and community.
We’re not here to help you get sober.
We’re here to help you live sober—and love it.
In this heartfelt episode of The Sober Curator, host Alysse Bryson is joined by a full lineup of Sober Curator contributors—Amy Liz Harrison, Alexandra Nyman, Megan Swan, Kim Parsley, and Dr. Sarah Michaud—to explore the life and legacy of Matthew Perry through a newly released documentary. The conversation delves into the documentary's focus on Perry's addiction battles, his recovery efforts, and his lasting impact. The episode also touches upon how Hollywood treats addiction and the role of documentaries in shaping these narratives.
Timestamps:
[00:00] – Introduction & Alysse Bryson's connection to Matthew Perry
[02:01] – Overview: Matthew Perry and the documentary
[03:16] – Key highlights of the documentary: addiction and recovery themes
[15:04] – The financial aspect of rehabilitation and its exploitation
[21:13] – Conversations about Big Pharma and harm reduction
[31:00] – Codependency within the circle of celebrities
[34:44] – The documentary's mixed narrative and impact on the community
[38:06] – Remembering Matthew Perry's legacy and the humor amidst tragedy
Resources & Links:
-Documentary: Matthew Perry: A Hollywood Tragedy
-Organization: Matthew Perry Foundation
-Review: ”Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing” by Alysse Bryson
-Review: ”Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing” by Amy Liz Harrison
–Alcohol + Substance Use Disorder Guide
–Recovery Nonprofit Resource Guide
–LBGTQ+ Recovery Resource Guide
Connect with Us:
-Website: www.thesobercurator.com
-Facebook: @The Sober Curator
-Instagram: @thesobercurator
-YouTube: @thesobercurator
-Pinterest: @thesobercurator
Follow & Subscribe:
If you enjoyed this episode, please consider leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Your feedback helps us improve and reach more listeners. Plus, the first 50 reviews on Apple Podcasts can win a sleek, limited edition Sober Curator fanny pack!
Send Feedback:
If you have a story, feedback, or just want to connect, email us at thesobercurator@gmail.com. We’d love to hear from you!
About:
Sobriety isn’t the end of the party—it’s just the start of a better one. Hosted by Alysse Bryson, media powerhouse and sobriety’s ultimate hype woman, and joined by Sober Curator contributors, The Sober Curator Podcast* delivers bold convos, pop culture deep dives, and zero-proof living that doesn’t suck. Whether you're sober, sober-curious, or just looking for good vibes without the hangover, we’ve got you covered. Subscribe now—because getting sober matters, staying sober matters more.
The intro and outro music for this episode is proudly featured with permission from Avatari. All rights reserved to the original creators. For more of their work, check out his website: https://www.avatariworld.com/music.
*The Sober Curator Podcast is a space for open and honest conversations about sobriety, recovery, and alcohol-free living. While we celebrate all paths to a sober lifestyle, some topics discussed may be sensitive or triggering for certain listeners. This podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. If you’re in recovery or exploring sobriety, please take care while listening and seek support from trusted professionals as needed.
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MOVIE NIGHT WITH THE SOBER CURATOR: is your go-to guide for films and documentaries that intricately weave addiction, recovery, and mental health into powerful storytelling. Think of us as your bee-zy movie critics, curating a hive of must-watch titles that inspire, educate, and spark conversation.
Our review archives are neatly organized into Drama, Dramedy, and Documentary categories, making it easy to find your next captivating watch. Whether you’re in the mood for a heartfelt indie, a laugh-through-the-tears comedy, or a thought-provoking doc, we’ve got you covered.
FAMILY RESOURCE GUIDE: Families play a pivotal role in both the path to and through recovery. Research shows that individuals with strong family support have significantly better outcomes, including higher rates of sustained sobriety and improved mental well-being.
According to SAMHSA, people in recovery who receive active support from family members are twice as likely to remain sober and successfully engage with treatment plans. In fact:
- Recovery programs with family involvement see over 60% higher adherence to treatment protocols.
- Nearly 90% of people in recovery credit family or caretaker emotional support as a significant factor in their continued sobriety.
- Active family engagement reduces relapse risk, helps establish healthy routines, and strengthens motivation and accountability.
Why Family Support Matters:
- Reduces stigma & isolation – Acceptance and understanding foster belonging.
- Boosts mental well-being – Emotional support can help prevent or manage co-occurring mental health issues.
- Promotes healthy lifestyles – Families encourage adherence to recovery plans and positive daily habits.
- Builds accountability – Ongoing connection provides motivation and stability.
When families commit to learning about addiction, joining support groups, and actively participating in recovery, their involvement becomes transformative—not just supportive. Recovery is a collective journey, and compassionate, informed family engagement can be the foundation for lasting change.
Additional Resources:
- Alcohol & Substance Use Disorder Guide
- Nonprofit Recovery Resource Guide
- Family Resource Guide
- LGBTQ+ Recovery Resource Guide
- Glossary of Addiction & Recovery Terms
- Recovery Stories
- Break Free Foundation – Scholarships for those unable to afford inpatient treatment
If you or someone you love is in immediate danger, call 911. If you are in crisis and need immediate help, call 988.
