If you’re single in your late twenties, thirties, or (gasp) beyond, The Unexpected Joy of Being Single by Catherine Gray feels like getting a warm, hilarious hug from someone who gets it. Over a third of us are now single, yet somehow society, our well-meaning relatives, and the endless scroll of romcoms haven’t quite caught up. Catherine Gray dives headfirst into the messy, cringey, and often hilarious reality of modern singlehood—and shows us why it’s not just okay, but can actually be joyful.
Gray’s approach is refreshingly real. After experiencing her own spiral of love addiction, dating app burnout, and “he didn’t text back” despair, she took a radical step: a year-long break from dating altogether. What she learned along the way—from psychologists, neuroscientists, and her own reverse-brainwashing journey—is that being single is not a waiting room for real life. It is real life.
What I loved most about this book is how deeply it resonated with my own story. I basically put the SPIN in SPINSTER, having been single for nearly my entire sobriety journey (which, as of now, is just shy of 19 years—one day at a time). I originally picked up The Unexpected Joy of Being Single in the name of “research” (I’m working on my own book) after loving Gray’s earlier work, The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober. It did not disappoint.
Gray’s writing is easy to devour—funny, insightful, and full of those moments where you find yourself nodding and thinking, Oh my God, same. She strikes the perfect balance between being relatable and offering real, research-backed advice. No finger-wagging. No “just love yourself more” clichés. Just honest storytelling with a side of science.
Whether you’re newly single, chronically single, or just single-curious, The Unexpected Joy of Being Single reminds us that our lives are already whole—no other half required. Highly recommend for anyone who’s tired of being told they’re “running out of time” and ready to start living on their own terms.
Self-Help Sobees Score: 4 out of 5
#QUITLIT BOOK REVIEW: “The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober” by Catherine Gray
TSC LIBRARY: Welcome to The Sober Curator Library! We don’t just read books; we immerse ourselves in literary journeys, tune in on Audible, and craft insightful reviews. Our digital shelves are organized into four genres: #QUITLIT, Addiction Fiction, Self-Help, and NA Recipe Books.
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