Skip to content
Close Menu
The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
    Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram Pinterest YouTube LinkedIn TikTok
    The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
    • HOME
    • ABOUT
      • DEAR READERS
      • MEET THE SOBER CURATOR
      • CONTRIBUTOR DIRECTORY
      • BUSINESS DIRECTORY
      • CONTACT
      • CONTENT PILLARS
      • PRESS
      • SOBEES
      • START A PODCAST
      • WRITE A BOOK
    • BACKSTAGE
    • NA DRINKS
      • NA BEERS & CIDERS
      • NA SPIRITS
      • NA WINES
      • READY TO DRINK
      • NA EVENTS
    • HEALTH & WELLNESS
      • CODEPENDENCY
      • MENTAL HEALTH
      • OPINION
      • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE
      • WELLNESS
      • YOGA & PILATES
    • LIFESTYLE
      • #ADDTOCART
      • COMING OUT SOBER
      • CONTENT CREATION
      • CURATED CRAFTS
      • FASHION
      • POETRY
      • SOBER SPOTLIGHT
      • UNBUZZED FEED
    • ENTERTAINMENT
      • #QUITLIT
      • EVENTS
      • GAME ROOM
      • MOVIES
      • PODCASTS
      • POP CULTURE
      • SOBER CURATOR PODCAST
      • SPORTS
      • TV SHOWS
    • TRAVEL
      • EVENTS
      • RETREATS
      • CRUISING GUIDE
      • WHAT A TRIP
      • SOBRIETY IN THE CITY
        • MINNEAPOLIS
        • NYC
        • SEATTLE
    • SPIRITUALITY
      • THE CARD DIVO
      • SPIRITUAL SUBSTANCE
      • STOICISM
      • THIRSTY FOR WONDER
      • YOGA + PILATES
    • RESOURCES
      • FAMILY RESOURCES
      • GLOSSARY
      • LGBTQ RESOURCES
      • NONPROFIT GUIDE
      • WE DO RECOVER
    The Sober CuratorThe Sober Curator
    Home - The Sober Politics of Big Dick Energy
    MUSIC - PLAY IT AGAIN!

    The Sober Politics of Big Dick Energy

    Anne Marie CribbinBy Anne Marie CribbinOctober 29, 20257 Mins Read
    The Sober Politics of Big Dick Energy
    Share
    Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Pinterest Email

    The first time I hit play on Taylor Swift’s new album, “The Life of a Showgirl,” I felt it in my body before I had words for it. It was the pulse of someone taking up space. It felt like lipstick and brass knuckles, politics and perfume. After several albums that felt like reading the open pages of her diary, this one walks the hallway in heels, head high and unbothered. But when I got to “Father Figure,” I knew what was coming. 

    “I’ll be your father figure, I drink that brown liquor 
    I can make deals with the devil because my dick’s bigger 
    This love is pure profit, just step into my office 
    They’ll know your name in the streets.” 

    Taylor Swift has written about sex, power and money before, but never with this kind of growl. But, rather than shock value, the lyrics play with inversion. She borrows the swagger of the men who profited from her work and makes it her own currency. And predictably, they made people furious. Within hours of release, critics called the album overproduced, immature, and empty. “The Atlantic” called Showgirl “the sound of an overworked and overexposed entertainer reaching the mountaintop to find something worse than disappointment: burnout.” “The Guardian” said it “lacks catchy hooks.” Threads and reels called it cringey, vapid, ego-drunk. 

    But let’s tell the truth: the backlash isn’t really about the music. It’s about how much we still hate a happy, confident woman. 

    The Purity Panic 

    Every generation invents new language for the same old control. Purity culture never left. It just learned better PR. It found a prettier way to say “behave.” It taught women that our worth is earned through restraint. Don’t drink too much. Don’t want too much. Don’t shine too much. There will always be a cost. 

    The rules keep changing, but the lesson stays the same. Joy must be justified. Desire must be disciplined. 

    So when a woman refuses to apologize for her pleasure, the moral panic kicks in. The reviews pretend to be about artistry, but they’re really sermons about tone. She’s too proud. Too sexual. Too self-referential. She should repent, reflect and return to sadness. That’s where “serious” women belong. 

    Showgirl refuses that confessional economy. Its beats are celebratory. The lyrics are mischievous. Its posture is unserious in the most serious way. It isn’t a fall-from-grace album. It’s an I-built-my-own-stage album. And that makes people deeply uncomfortable. 

    The Fear of Pleasure 

    Listen to “Wood”: 

    “Forgive me, it sounds cocky 
    He ah-matized me and opened my eyes 
    Redwood tree, it ain’t hard to see 
    His love was the key that opened my thighs.” 

    It is playful and explicit. Beneath the innuendo is something more radical: a woman naming her own arousal without shame. The double meaning — knocking on wood and sexual wordplay — is the point. Humor is the spark that burns the shame out of the room. 
     
    For centuries, male artists have built entire catalogs around conquest. They sing about bodies as territory and desire as proof of dominance. Those songs are called classics. When a woman writes about pleasure without apology, the response becomes a referendum on morality. 

    Critics reach for words like tacky or self-indulgent. What they really mean is too free. Too embodied. Too unbothered by the need to make her joy instructive or safe. The same ancient purity logic — that a woman must be either virtuous or degraded — is still alive in pop culture. It’s just wearing modern clothes. 

    What Taylor does here is refuse to frame desire as sin or spectacle. She doesn’t ask to be redeemed for wanting. She writes herself as the subject, not the lesson. That is the threat — and the triumph. 

    The Recovery Parallel 

    In my coaching work, I see this all the time. Women in recovery who feel guilty for feeling good. Who believe they have to suffer longer before joy is allowed. They turn healing into a project instead of a homecoming. 

    The backlash to “Showgirl” mirrors that same pattern. When women reclaim agency — in art, in sobriety, in their own bodies — the world calls it arrogance. When we refuse to stay small, we’re labeled self-absorbed. But freedom looks like self-trust. Recovery looks like turning the music up and remembering your body is yours. 

    Sobriety that serves compliance is praised; sobriety that serves freedom is disruptive. Taylor’s new album isn’t about alcohol, but it is about intoxication. The kind that comes from power, autonomy, audacity. That’s what makes the critics so uneasy. 

    The System She’s Mocking 

    “Father Figure” isn’t raunchy; it’s retribution. It takes aim at the men who profited from her catalogue and the gatekeepers who treated her as a brand to be traded. The line “I can make deals with the devil because my dick’s bigger” flips the script on the business-suit patriarchy. She uses their own language — boardroom bravado and locker-room bluster — to expose how ridiculous it’s always been. That isn’t vulgarity. It’s satire. 

    And satire is dangerous when it comes from someone you can’t dismiss. A powerful woman performing confidence is always coded as a threat. That’s why critics pretend her confidence is the problem. They can’t say, “We resent women who don’t need our approval,” so they say, “The production is overblown.” 

    Why It Hits So Hard 

    What critics call excess is actually restoration. “Showgirl” isn’t burnout. It’s what healing sounds like when a woman stops explaining herself. The volume, the radiance, the self assurance — that’s recovery made audible. 

    We’ve been taught — especially as women — that redemption should be quiet, and that belonging is something we earn by being good. But healing isn’t quiet. It laughs, moans, dances, seduces, swears. It has rhythm. 

    When Taylor sings like she’s reclaiming her own luster, it feels like permission to take up space and let pleasure stand as proof of growth instead of guilt. 

    The Real Politics of Big Dick Energy 

    The phrase “big dick energy” once belonged to men who could brag without insecurity. “Showgirl” steals it, rebuilds it and gives it back in sequins. It isn’t about anatomy. It’s about agency. When women move with that same unbothered confidence, patriarchy loses its favorite weapon: shame. Taylor Swift isn’t waiting for a cue. She’s running the show. And that, more than any lyric or beat, is the real scandal — a woman who knows she’s the main event. 

    She isn’t performing power. She’s turning it on.


    Taylor Swift – Wood (Lyric Video)

    #TaylorSwift’s “Wood” started from an “innocent place” ???? #TaylorOnFallon #TSTheLifeofaShowgirl

    Taylor Swift’s “The Life of a Showgirl”

    MUSIC – PLAY IT AGAIN! Album Review | Taylor Swift’s “The Life of a Showgirl”: Dancing Into Recovery’s Pink Cloud


    PLAY IT AGAIN is The Sober Curator’s curated playlist of sobriety anthems—songs that capture the essence of recovery journeys and lift the spirit. From timeless classics to modern hits, these tracks inspire, heal, and motivate, no matter what genre of choice. Each song is handpicked for its power to transport you to another state of mind and remind you why living alcohol-free rocks.

    Got a favorite sobriety theme song? We want to hear it! Send your picks to thesobercurator@gmail.com and help us keep the playlist growing.


    Other Taylor Swift Related Content Featured on TSC:

    CURATED CRAFTS: Taylor Swift Inspired Diamond Art Funko Pop-Ups: The Sparkliest Way to Spend a Sober Sunday

    SOBER SPORTS: Playoff Showdown Looms as Dolphins Take on Taylor Swift and the Chiefs: A Remarkable Journey of Sobriety for Dolphins Coach Mike McDaniels Since 2016

    MUSIC – PLAY IT AGAIN! TS12 Is Here. Showgirl Recovery Is Calling

    WALK YOUR TALK: Decoding Taylor Swift’s Iconic Style: My Name is Harley Skorpenske and I am a Sober Swiftie

    SOBER LIFESTYLE: Sober Swiftie Recovery Group, Swift Steps, based out of Philly is an Eras Concert, but Make it Sober

    MUSIC – PLAY IT AGAIN! Pop Princesses, Dopamine and the Recovery of Joy 

    Taylor Swift Diamond Painting Pop-up kits from Amazon

    SOBER POP CULTURE at The Sober Curator is where mainstream trends meet the vibrant world of sobriety. We serve up a mix of movie, podcast, fashion, and book recommendations alongside alcohol-free cocktails, celebrity features, and pop culture buzz—all with a sober twist.

    We’re here to shatter the “sobriety is boring” myth with a mash-up of 80s neon, 90s hip-hop edge, early 2000s bling, and today’s hottest trends. From celebrity shoutouts to red-carpet style inspo, this is where sober is as chic as it is fun. To the celebs using their platform for good—our Sober Pop Trucker hats are off to you!

    Resources Are Available

    If you or someone you know is experiencing difficulties surrounding alcoholism, addiction, or mental illness, please reach out and ask for help. People everywhere can and want to help; you just have to know where to look. And continue to look until you find what works for you. Click here for a list of regional and national resources.

    follow the sober curator on instagram

    Follow The Sober Curator on Instagram

    big dick energy father figure sober politics sober pop culture taylor swift The Life of a Showgirl travis kelce wood
    Share. Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn WhatsApp Reddit Tumblr Email
    Anne Marie Cribbin
    • Website
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • LinkedIn

    Anne Marie, founder of Thirsty For Wonder, is a recovery coach and spiritual companion. She inspires joyful, authentic living through compassionate support and Celtic wisdom.

    Related Posts

    Celebrity Couples Who Challenged Relationship Norms

    Celebrity Couples Who Challenged Relationship Norms — and What Their Stories Reveal About Honesty, Autonomy, and Reinvention

    June 17, 2026
    Euphoria Season 3 Finale

    Euphoria Grows Up, but Nobody Gets Better: A Sober Take on the Final Season

    June 8, 2026
    Sober Word Search Sober Pop Culture

    Sober Search | June 2026: Sober Pop Culture Showdown

    June 2, 2026
    Leave A Reply Cancel Reply

    Jones for Quitters
    TSC X Podcast Impact Studio Collab
    We are Raising the Bar
    Audible
    SoberCity App
    SOBERSCRIBE AND GET ON THE LIST!
    Road Recovery Outer Space Blend
    7 events found.
    • Week of June 22
    • Previous week
    • Next week
    Notice
    No events scheduled for June 22, 2026.
    Notice
    No events scheduled for June 23, 2026.
    7:00 pm
    Sober Sisters Trivia – Lenny Boy Brewing
    June 24 @ 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm EDT

    Sober Sisters Trivia – Lenny Boy Brewing

    Lenny Boy Brewing Co. 3000 South Tryon Street, Charlotte
    Ongoing
    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE
    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm EDT

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    Virgin Hotel NYC 1227 Broadway, New York
    $188.12
    Ongoing
    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE
    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm EDT

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    Virgin Hotel NYC 1227 Broadway, New York
    $188.12
    Sober Travel: South Thailand
    June 26 @ 8:00 am - July 7 @ 5:00 pm PDT

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    $2699
    3:00 pm
    🏙️ The Story of Us: Exploring Pittsburgh’s Past, Present & Future | Teetotal Initiative Pittsburgh
    June 26 @ 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm EDT

    🏙️ The Story of Us: Exploring Pittsburgh’s Past, Present & Future | Teetotal Initiative Pittsburgh

    5:00 pm
    Night of Recovery
    June 26 @ 5:00 pm - 8:00 pm EDT

    Night of Recovery

    The Theater at North 1539 North Main Avenue, Scranton
    Free
    + 4 More
    All Day
    Private women’s recovery weekend
    June 27 - June 29

    Private women’s recovery weekend

    St. Anthony Spirituality Center 300 East 4th Street, Marathon City
    Seine River Cruise
    June 27 - July 4

    Seine River Cruise

    Ongoing
    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE
    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm EDT

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    Virgin Hotel NYC 1227 Broadway, New York
    $188.12
    Sober Travel: South Thailand
    June 26 @ 8:00 am - July 7 @ 5:00 pm PDT

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    $2699
    4:00 pm
    Sober & Proud: Zero Proof Pride Bar Crawl
    June 27 @ 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm CDT

    Sober & Proud: Zero Proof Pride Bar Crawl

    Sober & Proud: Dallas Zero Proof Pride Crawl
    June 27 @ 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm CDT

    Sober & Proud: Dallas Zero Proof Pride Crawl

    Dallas Woody's 4011 Cedar Springs Road, Dallas
    Sober & Proud: Houston Zero Proof Pride Crawl🏳️‍🌈
    June 27 @ 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm CDT

    Sober & Proud: Houston Zero Proof Pride Crawl🏳️‍🌈

    817 Fairview St, Houston, TX 77006, USA 817 Fairview St, Houston
    + 5 More
    All Day
    Private women’s recovery weekend
    June 27 - June 29

    Private women’s recovery weekend

    St. Anthony Spirituality Center 300 East 4th Street, Marathon City
    Seine River Cruise
    June 27 - July 4

    Seine River Cruise

    Ongoing
    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE
    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm EDT

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    Virgin Hotel NYC 1227 Broadway, New York
    $188.12
    Sober Travel: South Thailand
    June 26 @ 8:00 am - July 7 @ 5:00 pm PDT

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    $2699
    10:00 am
    Fresh Start: Seven Steps to Center – June | Teetotal Initiative
    June 28 @ 10:00 am - 11:00 am EDT

    Fresh Start: Seven Steps to Center – June | Teetotal Initiative

    Virtual
    Free
    + 4 More
    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> EDT </span>

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm EDT

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE A GLOBAL GATHERING LIKE NO OTHER JUNE 25th - 29th, 2026 ​ GSM+ is not a roundup nor some average conference—it's a vibrant, inclusive

    $188.12
    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> EDT </span>

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    June 26 @ 8:00 am - July 7 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    June 26 @ 8:00 am - July 7 @ 5:00 pm PDT

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    There are a million reasons Thailand is called the Land of Smiles. The fragrant flowers, breezy islands, sandy beaches, and endless seafood are a few. Waking up every day feeling

    $2699
    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> EDT </span>

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    June 26 @ 8:00 am - July 7 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    June 27 - June 29

    Private women’s recovery weekend

    Private women’s recovery weekend

    June 27 - June 29

    Private women’s recovery weekend

    Private women’s recovery weekend A weekend to let go, connect with your sobriety sisters and yourself and renewing your spirit Private Women’s Recovery Weekend Join us for a relaxing and empowering in-person getaway

    June 27 - July 4

    Seine River Cruise

    Seine River Cruise

    June 27 - July 4

    Seine River Cruise

    Seine River Cruise Fellowship-Centered Sober Cruises At Sober Celebrations, we believe that travel is the only thing you can buy that makes you richer. We're passionate about helping folks in

    June 25 @ 12:00 pm - June 29 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> EDT </span>

    GSM+ 2026 The Year of LOVE

    June 26 @ 8:00 am - July 7 @ 5:00 pm <span class='timezone'> PDT </span>

    Sober Travel: South Thailand

    June 27 - June 29

    Private women’s recovery weekend

    June 27 - July 4

    Seine River Cruise

    Monday, June 22, 2026

    No events on this day.

    Tuesday, June 23, 2026

    No events on this day.

    Wednesday, June 24, 2026

    • June 24, 2026 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm
      Sober Sisters Trivia – Lenny Boy Brewing
    • June 24 @ 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm EDT

      Sober Sisters Trivia – Lenny Boy Brewing

      Sober Sisters Trivia - Lenny Boy Brewing   Join us for Sober Sisters Trivia at Lenny Boy—fun vibes, great company (+ kombucha), and hopefully a team victory! All are welcome!

    Thursday, June 25, 2026

    No events on this day.

    Friday, June 26, 2026

    • June 26, 2026 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm
      🏙️ The Story of Us: Exploring Pittsburgh’s Past, Present & Future | Teetotal Initiative Pittsburgh
    • June 26 @ 3:00 pm - 5:00 pm EDT

      🏙️ The Story of Us: Exploring Pittsburgh’s Past, Present & Future | Teetotal Initiative Pittsburgh

      🏙️ The Story of Us: Exploring Pittsburgh’s Past, Present & Future | Teetotal Initiative Pittsburgh Friday, June 26th | 3 PM @ The Heinz History Center Every city has a

    • June 26, 2026 5:00 pm - 8:00 pm
      Night of Recovery
    • June 26 @ 5:00 pm - 8:00 pm EDT

      Night of Recovery

      Night of Recovery presented by Cold Bore Counseling Free Community Event! Cold Bore Counseling presents "Night of Recovery" a free event for the community. Hosted by Chris Dreisbach. With special

      Free
    • June 26, 2026 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm
      Cali Sober Mocktail Making Class
    • June 26 @ 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm EDT

      Cali Sober Mocktail Making Class

      Cali Sober Mocktail Making Class   Join us for a fun Cali Sober Mocktail Making Class and mix up some tasty, booze-free mocktails (add Levity "spirits" for a Cali-Sober vibe)!

    + 4 More

    Saturday, June 27, 2026

    • June 27, 2026 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm
      Sober & Proud: Zero Proof Pride Bar Crawl
    • June 27 @ 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm CDT

      Sober & Proud: Zero Proof Pride Bar Crawl

      Sober & Proud: Zero Proof Pride Bar Crawl This is all about redefining nightlife and creating intentional, alcohol-free experiences for Pride, because everyone deserves to celebrate fully and feel included,

    • June 27, 2026 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm
      Sober & Proud: Dallas Zero Proof Pride Crawl
    • June 27 @ 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm CDT

      Sober & Proud: Dallas Zero Proof Pride Crawl

      Sober & Proud: Dallas Zero Proof Pride Crawl A whole new way to Pride — no hangover required. Join the movement redefining nightlife in Dallas! Sober & Proud: Zero Proof

    • June 27, 2026 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm
      Sober & Proud: Houston Zero Proof Pride Crawl🏳️‍🌈
    • June 27 @ 4:00 pm - 10:00 pm CDT

      Sober & Proud: Houston Zero Proof Pride Crawl🏳️‍🌈

      Sober & Proud: Houston Zero Proof Pride Crawl🏳️‍🌈 Join the movement redefining nightlife in Houston! Sober & Proud: Zero Proof Pride Crawl takes over EaDo with a high-vibe, non-alcoholic Pride

    + 5 More

    Sunday, June 28, 2026

    • June 28, 2026 10:00 am - 11:00 am
      Fresh Start: Seven Steps to Center – June | Teetotal Initiative
    • June 28 @ 10:00 am - 11:00 am EDT

      Fresh Start: Seven Steps to Center – June | Teetotal Initiative

      Fresh Start: Seven Steps to Center - June | Teetotal Initiative Sun, Jun 28 | Virtual Event Month 6: Third Eye Chakra — Cultivating Intuition & Insight (Color: Indigo) Time

      Free
    • June 28, 2026 11:00 am - 5:00 pm
      Pride Parade
    • June 28 @ 11:00 am - 5:00 pm EDT

      Pride Parade

      Pride Parade Heritage of Pride works toward a future without discrimination where all people have equal rights under the law. We do this by producing LGBTQIA+ Pride events that inspire,

    • June 28, 2026 12:00 pm - 5:00 pm
      Sober Pride Party at Yotel Hotel
    • June 28 @ 12:00 pm - 5:00 pm PDT

      Sober Pride Party at Yotel Hotel

      Sober Pride Party at Yotel Hotel Come join us for a fabulous celebration of SOBER PRIDE at YOTEL San Francisco! Get ready for an afternoon of fun, music, and community

    + 4 More
    View Calendar
    Sober Travel Handbook
    Sober Pop Culture Celebrity Memoirs
    QUITLIT CLASSICS
    Hope Junkies
    Clean AF Apparel
    TSC Rolodex powered by Far Point Strategy
    The Sober Curator
    Facebook Instagram X (Twitter) TikTok YouTube Pinterest
    • PRIVACY POLICY
    • LINKS DISCLAIMER
    • EDITORIAL GUIDELINES
    • TERMS OF SERVICE
    • REFUND POLICY
    • DON’T SELL MY INFO
    • DATA SUBJECT REQUEST FORM
    • CONTACT US
    © 2026 The Sober Curator - Benefits of a Alcohol Free Lifestyle

    Type above and press Enter to search. Press Esc to cancel.