When I walked into rehab, I had no idea that a simple task that THEY MADE ME DO would change the trajectory of my life. For the first couple days at the facility, I was at they let you decompress and not have a daily unit chore BUT you did have to make your bed everyday and yes it was checked by staff. I have no memory of my parents telling me to make my bed or even if I did before getting into recovery.
I remember thinking what a stupid thing that these people are making me do. Why is making my bed important?? My rebellious nature wanted to leave my bed a crumpled mess but the voice in my head repeated over and over the best advice I was given before heading to treatment, “do everything they tell you to do, they know better than you.”
So every morning I made my bed and still do (for the most part) to this day, almost 18 years later. I never thought about the why, I just knew my life was better when I did it.
A couple years ago, I did 75 Hard and one of the daily tasks is to read ten pages of non-fiction book. That is where I was introduced to Make Your Bed by Admiral William H. McRaven. I read the book and finally figured out why that simple task makes all the difference. This book offered me valuable insights into discipline, resilience, and personal responsibility. While the book doesn’t specifically focus on substance use recovery, its principles can be applied to support individuals in that journey.
Here are my Takeaways:
- Start your day with a task completed: Make your bed. I look at my recovery as something I do every day and sometimes, I really knock it out of the park and some days I am still standing in the dugout. BUT if I make my bed every day I get to go into my room at night and know that I did at least one thing good for the day and something I could be proud of. In early recovery, I needed small wins, and the bed was a simple task I could complete while trying to navigate a whole new world.
- You Can’t Go It Alone: I don’t know where I would be without my recovery army. The author talks about as a Navy Seal he carried a boat around with his classmates and that when one person was weak the rest of the team dug deep and carried the weight for that one person. That is what recovery looks like when you are part of community. They pull you up, push you when you need it, and support you in tough times.
- Only the Size of Your Heart Matters: There was a bet placed on me in treatment. A woman there bet I would never make it and all I heard was “Prove me wrong. People are going to judge you and your recovery, no matter what (I am guilty of it), but I know that in recovery, it doesn’t matter how many meetings I go to or if I say the exact right thing or give the best testimony, all that matters is that I work every day to be a better person. I have my heart in the game of recovery, and that matters more than anything.
- Life’s Not Fair-Drive On!: I have never once asked the universe Why Me? I look at my addiction as the greatest gift I could ever be given. Life isn’t fair, I see that all the time with this disease but no matter what I keep moving forward.
- Failure Can Make You Stronger: Plain and simple, failure is going to happen, but out of life’s greatest struggles comes life’s greatest lessons. Look at every person at a meeting, everyone in recovery; we are stronger because of our struggles.
- You Must Dare Greatly: Recovery is the epitome of “you don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step”. I had to risk everything when I got on the plane to go to treatment, I had no idea if it was going to work but I had to take the leap and trust the process.
- Stand Up to Bullies: Nothing or nobody can stand in the way of my sobriety. Throughout the years, I have had to defend my recovery to many people, but none of that matters to me because I believe my life is made better by my decision to live sober. If I worry about what others think about that decision, my life will be ruled by them. I didn’t put all this hard work into giving my power to another person, place, or thing.
- Rise to the Occasion: For me to be successful in recovery, I have had to live outside my comfort zone for the better part of 18 years. I find solace in selfishness, fear and worry, that circle in my soul is safe. Abundance, Joy, and Peace are outside of that circle, and every day, I look for ways to experience the promises of recovery, but I have to search. They don’t come naturally, and I need to stand up and go after what fills my soul with good things, I have to do the work, no one else can do it for me.
- Give People Hope: I think this is self-explanatory in how it relates to recovery. I share my story so that others can find hope. Pass it on….
- Never, Ever Quit!: Single and to the point, don’t pick up again. I make that choice every morning and hope that you do too. Don’t give up before the miracle happens.
As I read this book, I couldn’t help but chuckle at the practical advice on life’s challenges, all tied together with the central theme of, you guessed it, making your bed! When I finally realized why the treatment center made us make out beds it was like life had come full circle. Who knew that such a seemingly mundane task could be the launching pad for a day filled with triumphs and victories?
The Sobees Self-Help Club Score: 3 out of 5
Speech by Admiral McRaven
Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.
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